First I received a pamphlet in the mail stating the FDA has approved a Covid vax so let's get you signed up for the jab. I called the number and asked about the FDA approved one. After a long hold they read me a long explanation from the CDC.
I asked if the FDA approved one was available. They put me on hold again and again read me a statement about how the EUA jab and FDA version are "interchangeable" so not to worry.
I told them I was needed the FDA approved and they informed me that is is FDA approved under EUA. I replied that it was still considered experimental medicine without the FDA approval.
I said that if I take the EUA jab that Pfizer cannot be held liable and that I needed to locate the FDA approved. She tried to tell me again that they are "interchangeable" I replied that I wouldn't have legal recourse if I had an adverse reaction because it was still considered experimental.
At that moment all the brain gears, levers, and wheels, all lubricated with pure CDC horse shit, stopped working in a extraordinary display of reaching the edge of their reality and the barrier between truth and cognitive dissonance. The vocal chords created a jumbled smash up sound trying to work without any signals being sent. When the clarity ended and cognitive dissonance again took hold I was asked to be put on hold again. I said that was all I needed to know and hung up.
Well worth it.
Nice job! I love calling them. It's better than the prank phone calls we made when we were kids. You have to be patient when being put on hold. It's part of their breakdown process. Priceless!!!
Jerky boys? Fn classics. I can still here that squeaky voice saying "hello"