Okay, i think I found an actual shortage. Went to three stores today, different chains, looking for a box of saltines. All anybody had was whole wheat. I'm sorry, I'm all for fiber and all but whole wheat saltines taste awful and have virtually no fiber. Philosophers are pondering why they exist, it's one of the mysteries of the universe.
Anyway, right now they're apparently the only kind of saltines that do exist. Oh, one store had a couple of salt free. That's an oxymoron - a salt free saltine. Another wrinkle in the space time continuum that I'm not touching with a 10 foot pole made out of unicorn horns.
I suspect some hoarder out there is chowing down on catfood slathered saltines, perhaps with a sliver of hard boiled egg.
Ashland, my dear dogge. I hate to tell you this but it's going to take a LOT more than peanut butter to hide the taste of those vile crackers. Do you happen to have any Friskies Tuna Pate around? That might do the trick. If not, add some sauerkraut and eight or nine whole garlic cloves.
GrandpaFree used to put a dab of mustard, a slice of pickle, and a dab of Worcestershire sauce on a saltine. Swore up and down it tasted like steak. I never tried it, but I would if it meant I won't starve.
Okay, i think I found an actual shortage. Went to three stores today, different chains, looking for a box of saltines. All anybody had was whole wheat. I'm sorry, I'm all for fiber and all but whole wheat saltines taste awful and have virtually no fiber. Philosophers are pondering why they exist, it's one of the mysteries of the universe.
Anyway, right now they're apparently the only kind of saltines that do exist. Oh, one store had a couple of salt free. That's an oxymoron - a salt free saltine. Another wrinkle in the space time continuum that I'm not touching with a 10 foot pole made out of unicorn horns.
I suspect some hoarder out there is chowing down on catfood slathered saltines, perhaps with a sliver of hard boiled egg.
You have to become an existentialist....
I have several boxes of whole wheat crackers "salted" away...
I agree with you that they are not very edible but I figure with some peanut butter, they will beat a snowball....
I enjoy reading well written posts...
Ashland, my dear dogge. I hate to tell you this but it's going to take a LOT more than peanut butter to hide the taste of those vile crackers. Do you happen to have any Friskies Tuna Pate around? That might do the trick. If not, add some sauerkraut and eight or nine whole garlic cloves.
Howls, Julia Child you are not....
Cat food is too rich for my system...
...the sauerkraut and garlic recipe has potential....
I find it miiiighty fishy (heh) that the saltines and the cat food disappeared at the same time.
GrandpaFree used to put a dab of mustard, a slice of pickle, and a dab of Worcestershire sauce on a saltine. Swore up and down it tasted like steak. I never tried it, but I would if it meant I won't starve.
Damn! [they] can't even let us have regular, salt, white crackers? Who wilouldve known [their] hatred for salty, white crackers was so deeply rooted?
Hmmm, a real clue to their evil intent. Of course, Salty Cracker is the real target. We're just collateral damage.