1 Nuclear Launch Codes To Be Stored Securely On CNN+ Broadcast Where No One Will Ever See Them

https://babylonbee.com/news/nuclear-launch-codes-to-be-stored-securely-on-cnn-broadcast-where-no-one-will-ever-see-them

2 Pharisees Delighted By This New 'Wokeness' Thing That Lets Them Constantly Judge And Make Everyone Feel Guilty

https://babylonbee.com/news/pharisees-delighted-by-this-new-wokeness-thing-that-lets-them-constantly-judge-and-make-everyone-feel-guilty

3 After Being Denied Tattoo, Sixth Grader Decides To Have Gender Reassignment Surgery Instead

https://babylonbee.com/news/after-being-denied-tattoo-sixth-grader-decides-to-have-gender-reassignment-surgery-instead

4 Orcs March On Minas Tirith In Mostly Peaceful Protest

https://babylonbee.com/news/orcs-march-on-minas-tirith-in-mostly-peaceful-protest

5 Amazon's New Lord Of The Rings Series To Include Bisexual Transgender Elf In Wheelchair

https://babylonbee.com/news/amazons-new-lord-of-the-rings-series-to-include-transgender-elf-in-wheelchair

6 Pure Flix Debuts Gritty New Christian Drama 'Breaking Good'

https://babylonbee.com/news/pure-flix-debuts-gritty-new-christian-drama-breaking-good

7 Liberal Worried That Next COVID-19 Wave Might Be Too Mild To Use To Push Agenda

https://babylonbee.com/news/liberal-worried-that-next-covid-19-wave-might-be-too-mild-to-use-to-push-agenda

8 Man Imports Chinese Version Of Films So He Doesn't Have To See All The LGBTQ Stuff

https://babylonbee.com/news/desantis-signs-bill-mandating-florida-theaters-show-whatever-version-of-each-movie-is-released-in-china

9 Investigators Claim David Used Illegal ‘Ghost’ Sling In Lethal Assault Against Goliath

https://babylonbee.com/news/rumors-circulate-that-king-david-used-illegal-ghost-sling-in-lethal-assault-against-goliath

10 Mickey Mouse Tells Viewers That Transgender Surgery Scalpel Is 'A Surprise Tool That Will Help Us Later'

https://babylonbee.com/news/mickey-mouse-tells-viewers-that-transgender-surgery-scalpel-is-a-surprise-tool-that-will-help-us-later

...don't worry...

...Bee happy...

u/#howl