posted ago by rooftoptendie ago by rooftoptendie +200 / -0

I'm looking for food even morons can grow.

I'm also looking for what would be the most calorie efficient thing to grow. For instance cucumbers are not as smart to grow as potatoes?

What would your advice be for a literally retarded farmer.

Comments (197)
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Mary911 73 points ago +73 / -0

I just set out 2 gardens. One at my son's house and one at mine that both families are going to share in. Make sure you have picked a very sunny spot for your garden.

Corn...very easy. Plant in the row 4 inches apart and 1 to 1 1/2 inches deep. Space your rows about2 to 3 feet apart.

Tomatoes.....just go buy some ready to grow plants at LOWES or Walmart. Dig a hole deep enough for the base of the plant. You can also tear of a couple of the leaves at the bottom of the plant to help stimulate growth. Water with a bit of Miracle Gro every other week. I try not to fertilize mine too much. Never water a tomato from the top of the plant; always at the base and preferably NOT in the HEAT of the day.

Potatoes....dig your furrow 'row' pretty deep. I cut my potatoes where there is an 'eye' on each part. Then I plant them close together in the furrow. Cover and "HILL" them up. You will have to 'hill them up' on occasion as they need plenty of room to root out. Also you want to make sure you don't have any potatoes showing through the dirt causing them to turn 'green.' There will be what we call "potato bugs" on the plants at times. They look like an orange beetle. Get you either some pesticide dust or simply go down the plants and pop the bugs between your fingers which is much better than adding pesticides. (Your fingers will turn a bright orange) but is well worth it.

Green beans and beans of all types except "pole" beans. Plant these as you would corn. Most of these are 'bush' type beans and grow in the row together in one long line.

Squash and zucchini, okra, and other veggies...just read the back of the package and it will tell you how to plant, how deep and your row spacing. Don't forget to water preferably in the late afternoon. Don't forget to save some space on the side or in a spot by itself for some good watermelon and cantaloupe.

You can make your own 'natural' fertilizer by adding leaves, twigs, pine cones, potato and veggie peelings and other organic matter that will break down. NO MEAT. Add water and cover. Put in a sunny place and let the stuff break down naturally. Make sure it is a big enough container. Stir periodically. After about a month, get an old jar and gather the juice. Add the juice to your watering can and add water to make it look like tea. Your plants will love it.

Also collect and rake leaves and grass cuttings and simply put them to the side of your yard somewhere. Add organic material, peelings and such and let these ferment for a time. Continue adding stuff periodically. Turn with a pitchfork or some tool on occasion. This will eventually turn to some great garden mulch.

HAPPY PLANTING. Hope this helps.

penisse 33 points ago +33 / -0

Some say only some roaches would survive a nuclear holocaust… but these roaches would be mercilessly crushed by our beloved indestructible u/Mary911 (and end in the compost) should they try to disturb her Godly peace.🤗💐

entwickelnden 9 points ago +9 / -0


Devolution1776 5 points ago +5 / -0


Mary911 4 points ago +4 / -0

Oh thank you for making me laugh. I got home at about 11:30 with the kids. That was after I cleaned a few things for her and went outside to plant some onion sets and some garlic cloves, then I hilled up my potatoes and got the weeds out from between the rows. It was hard trying to do that and keep up with Ninky because her other 3 brothers refused to watch her while I did this task; but I got it done. You simply have to look at it as a 'Labor of Love' for when the time comes to 'chomp' into some of that fresh produce that God's loving sunshine and rain so tenderly helped spring to life for our benefit.

I did leave out a few crucial things like Make sure you weed and hoe the garden; unless you're laying down plastic between the rows. But with todays inflation, who's got the spare money. I put on my "Gumbo Mudders" that is my rain boots and some garden gloves and a floppy straw hat and go to work. Thats all there is to it. You work hard, then you reap the benefits of a good harvest. Amen.

Got to go, time to cook Supper. I'll read you when I can. Take care my friend.

MommaChz1 17 points ago +17 / -0

Also you can throw down certain herbs and flowers which will actually improve the taste of the veggies and keep bad bugs away. Thyme, marigolds, basil are all very easy to grow.

335K 13 points ago +13 / -0

Not an expert Gardener myself but I've done tomatoes the last few years and yes, this kind of thing (basil around the tomatoes) is supposed to also help with pests.

Late on my garden this year, been injured. This OP serves as a much needed reminder!


patriotT 7 points ago +7 / -0

Nasturtiums also kept the aphids away. Also using big tin cans cut on both ends around the plants keep out varmits and then the plants draw the heat from the can.

VulgarProfit 6 points ago +6 / -0

Chamomile keep some bugs away

Mary911 4 points ago +4 / -0

Yes Ma'am. I hear that marigolds are the best flowers to plant along the edges of your garden. Great hints. Thanks.

penisse 1 point ago +1 / -0

My experience with marigolds is they attract slugs so when cooking we keep all the egg shells all year long in a bucket and we crush them and pour the shred on the soil when we plant the tomatoes and others : slugs hate crawling on shredded egg shells. Then, before the sun gets down, I take my shears and go behead any slug approaching the vegetables for a night snack, the ones coming later will focus on eating their cadavers. Slugs really are a pest.

Mary911 2 points ago +2 / -0

Quit stealing my ideas; haha. That's what I've been doing with mine.

penisse 1 point ago +1 / -0


How are you? Can you still find some time for a due rest? How’s Dear George?

Mary911 1 point ago +1 / -0


George is fine too. Wish I could get some extra sleep; but it seems that next week I will be having to get up at 3AM so I can wake up to be at their house at 4AM. Just when I was getting used to 6. It's always something. How's Anne and the kitties? Hope they're all well and cuddly fine. I'll try to get on here when the chances are right. I'll be hearing from you.

penisse 1 point ago +1 / -0

Dear Mary, so honoured to have you spend some more energy giving me news though you should be asleep… and so should I be. Back from a classical concert (opera) where a friend was acting. Beautiful music by Vivaldi.

Everyone is fine here: my lack of quality sleep once again makes me inflate (thirsty, drinking lots of water and not getting rid of it properly…until I get enough rest and joy).

As of Thursday next week, I will be in Burgundy until the beginning of June with reduced work hours. I shall finally complete my songs and get deeper in my piano study. I love piano. We always say nasty things about Reddit but the specific subreddits are fine. r/piano is a goldmine where many aspiring virtuosos successfully communicated me their love of this instrument: on a guitar, there are many ways to play one note, on a piano, there is one, but beware who finger plays it as you have to be ready for the next note.

I love Franz Liszt… https://youtu.be/MD6xMyuZls0 piano should not be boring.

The lady in red is a Ukrainian pro-Peace person. She’s having lots of hate sent towards her for her moderate opinions. Many agents cancel her concerts.

I hope you like this song and see like me the way she’s looking at her piano rather than her provocative dress. The people in the room had no zoom so I guess it was not supposed to look that glamorous from a typical seat.

There’s something I don’t quite understand: were you not supposed to work that hard for your children a few months ago? I hope everyone finds his comfort zone again and you get the rest you desserve. Why 4AM? Do Ninky and Brayden wake that soon?

In soul with you, praying for your happiness every chance I get.🙏🏻💐

Hopiumaddict 12 points ago +12 / -0

If you plant corn, plant a lot. Even 10 stalks is not enough. Two dozen would be a minimum to ensure the flowering process is successful.

YouTube and rumble videos are verrrrry helpful. Lots of backyard farmers out there sharing their experiences. It can be a lot of r&d and expenses. Learn from their mistakes! Less costly.

Mary911 3 points ago +3 / -0

YES! Everyone loves that corn on the cob in the summer months. Fresh cut fried corn on the stove. Mmmm! Reminds me of my grandmothers. And how we canned the corn by the quarts. Nothing like home canned good corn in the cold winter months.

throwawayforyou 3 points ago +3 / -0

Do i still have time to germ seeds? Zone 7a

Hopiumaddict 4 points ago +4 / -0

Seeds germinate quickly for corn. You should be good to start now, but don’t plant outside until consistent 70 degree temps.

HebsFarm 3 points ago +3 / -0

It is late to germ seeds now as they will be trying to mature in high summer, but you can plant in August and have a nice October harvest before frost

throwawayforyou 1 point ago +1 / -0

Thank you! Anything else you recommend I plant in 7a for August? I have seen cabbage and root veg do well. I have a greenhouse that is getting way too hot and humid so im moving it into a shady spot of the yard to try to use it this year.

HebsFarm 2 points ago +2 / -0

If your dirt is still workable in August (not baked to stone), then peas, beans, broccolli, cauliflower should all do fine planted in Aug and harvest in late October.

throwawayforyou 1 point ago +1 / -0

Thank you!

Rainspa 1 point ago +1 / -0

You can do it in an InstantPot.

DropTheLeash 11 points ago +11 / -0

Wealth of knowledge! Thank you!

Mary911 2 points ago +2 / -0

You're so welcome. Hope it is beneficial to you and others who may never have had the opportunity to plant something. Good luck and God bless.

CaptainQirk 8 points ago +8 / -0

Saved this post as informative!

Mary911 3 points ago +3 / -0

Good. We are all here to help one another out in times of need. God bless. Hope your family are all well and safe. Always ask if you need something. Someone on here will come to your aid; that's what we do.

deleted 45 points ago +45 / -0
Lapstrake 39 points ago +39 / -0

I recommend planting bacon. Everybody loves it.

HighCountryAZ 3 points ago +3 / -0

I wish!!!

funwithguitars 2 points ago +2 / -0

Gotta get me some of those bacon seeds!

probablyacoincidence 3 points ago +3 / -0

Just had 6 new seeds born two days ago. The future is full of bacon and chops

rooftoptendie [S] 22 points ago +22 / -0


always with the chickens here.

I've heard if you accidentally plant a rooster, it can infest your whole crop. Maybe that's what went wrong for you?

inquimous 4 points ago +4 / -0

I know if you bury a dead cat, you get a pussy willow.

MammasAlwaysRIGHT 4 points ago +4 / -0

Cock rot!

entwickelnden 4 points ago +4 / -0

im getting into quail, seems like a better choice then chicken for a number of us.

Munchaussen 4 points ago +4 / -0

Probably overwatered.

7Nick9 3 points ago +3 / -0

You have to power boil them first ! Gosh !😆

SaltyKarens 20 points ago +20 / -0

Potatoes are super easy. I am using a tower method which uses straw/soil mixture for dumb ape harvesting and already have 6 - 1' plants growing from dried quarter chunks planted last month.


Munchaussen 5 points ago +8 / -3

You can stack old tires and plant potatoes that way. Easy to harvest and no digging.

Lawjic 11 points ago +11 / -0

I shudder to think of the toxins leaching into your soil from tires and possibly contaminating your crop. Just dig the dang hole.

ImBillCurtis 1 point ago +1 / -0

Yeah that’s really, really not safe. There’s a reason why the EPA tests soil for petroleum contaminants and your local water municipalities discourage dumping oil and rubber.

inquimous 5 points ago +5 / -0

I think potatoes are easy as even in Phoenix I can grow them. However, I suspect Rooftoptendies lives in SoCal. If you have cockroaches, this tire method results in cockroach heaven and if you live in a super hot area, the tires get very hot in the sun.. Grow bags are better if the climate isn't too dry, plus they are light and easy to store. Potatoes need a little supplemental fertilizer. Harvest when the tops start dying.

GreenLivesMatter 15 points ago +15 / -0

Weed. Everyone will trade food for weed.

ILearnedToCode 3 points ago +3 / -0

Can confirm. Would definitely trade food for weed.

PowderRoomPolitics 11 points ago +11 / -0

Sweet potatoes. You can start them in a rather similar way as potatoes, but another way is to buy a sweet potato, use popsicle sticks or whatever to prop it up, and soak the bottom in water until it sprouts leaves, roughly 3 weeks or so. Then just plant it. in most places they will go wild and may even take over your whole garden.


TSearch 11 points ago +11 / -0

Depending on where you live you can plant a fall garden too. I love planting a variety if greens, turnips, and red beets for the fall and early winter. Where I live I’ve had a few mild winters where my greens survived and produced all winter long. And the are super easy.

inquimous 8 points ago +8 / -0

Underrated comment. Climate and seasons are crucial! E.g. in Phoenix the best time to start many things is Sept. or Oct. and protect from short frost season. Starting in "spring" results in withered stalks by May.

entwickelnden 4 points ago +4 / -0

wow, ya, didnt think about doing that. I will this year

Magpi 11 points ago +11 / -0

Short answer: dandelions

Almost everyone is already growing them! And trying to get rid of them! They make a great salad. However, the later in the season it gets, the more bitter and tough they taste but they are still edible. I believe all parts are edible (except perhaps the roots but that might be used for other things, such as a drink). Source of protein, calcium, iron, Vitamins A and C.

Also, plantain, another weed (not talking about the banana-ish thing here). Google the images so you'll know what you're looking for. It's likely you played with the stem as a child to shoot the seed heads of them off into the yard somewhere. The leaf is great in/as salad.

Also, wood sorrel, yet another weed. Heart shaped leaves in a 3-leaf clover pattern, tastes like lemons.

If you're a horrible gardener, consider buying a paperback guide to edible wild plants in your region. BUT do also try to grow other things that the other pedes on here mention because you want a variety of nutrition.

BEWARE: As these are "weeds" make sure you aren't pulling/eating weeds that have been sprayed with chemicals. Unless you LIKE having a penis grow out of your forehead.

Happy weed pulling!

TSearch 12 points ago +12 / -0

When I was a kid my mom would send us out with a bucket and little spade to dig up dandelions. She would make a wilted salad with hot bacon dressing.

entwickelnden 6 points ago +6 / -0

what, a hot bacon dressing? that sounds tasty.

Magpi 6 points ago +6 / -0

Oh stop, I'm getting hungry!!! That sounds divine.

TSearch 7 points ago +7 / -0

Thank you for bringing back a great old memory. We foraged for a lot of things when I was a kid. Mushrooms, wild asparagus, dandelions, raspberries, blackberries, and nuts. Simpler times.

LadyBoothall 3 points ago +3 / -0

Tsearch would you share a recipe for hot bacon dressing. Thanks. That brought back some memories.

TSearch 5 points ago +5 / -0

My mom didn’t really use a recipe. She mixed bacon fat, salt, pepper, sugar, and apple cider vinegar until it was steaming. I never remember her measuring, just cooking to taste.

My personal favorite recipe came from a collection of Amish recipes called Cooking from Quilt Country. I can’t find a version of it online.

Here is one pretty close. I personally prefer apple cider vinegar over white vinegar.


Not really a Q topic, but let’s just say saving your bacon fat is a survival tip for when the storm is upon us.

LadyBoothall 2 points ago +2 / -0

Thank you. Will make survival tastier.

inquimous 6 points ago +6 / -0

The big old bitter dandelions are the ones that are best for medicinal tea, though.

penisse 5 points ago +5 / -0

Also try nettles, you cook it like spinach and you may also use it to create textile if they’re not tender anymore.

Magpi 3 points ago +3 / -0

Yes! Just don't touch them (to harvest) with your bare hands lol. Voice of experience on that one.

inquimous 2 points ago +2 / -0

We had them in the woods, in Oregon. Better than spinach. Also fiddlehead ferns. Take a bag or basket and scissors, cut the tips of the nettles into that so you don't touch them. Although, handling them with gloves will break off the little poison spikes and make them safer before cooking.

VetforTrump 10 points ago +10 / -0

Potatoes, squash including winter squash (can be stored for up to a year some of them). Tomatoes etc.

I don't recommend corn as there are too many problems. Takes up a ton of room, water and beats the shit out of your soil.

Beans of many types (high in protein), carrots. Leafy greens of all sorts.

Miztivin 10 points ago +10 / -0

Sweet potatoes. Grow like weeds. Can eat the leaves if lightly steamed. Come back every year. At least in the south anyway, they do well.

Theyre vines and make pretty flowers, kinda look like morning glorys, (fun fact, theyre in the same family) so if you have a fence thats perfect.

If not. They will grow over a yard space horizontally no problem. You can litterally lawnmower them to keep them in check and theyll be fine (trust me, youll have to)

Dont mix them up with yams or regular potatoes. Theyre actually completely different and grow differently.

Rightnow is the time to plant them too. Just buy a sweet potatoe, cut it up into 4 sections and toss the peices in the ground. Ive had a ton of luck with these pretty Japanese sweet potatoes I found at the super market. Theyre my fave so far.

january20 3 points ago +3 / -0

I thought you had to start them with "slips" that you propagate from sweet potatoes? I've been working on that, and discovered that it's not as foolproof as some would say. But, I finally have some slips that are coming on. Required some heat from a seedling mat and a grow light. We've also had a somewhat cold and cloudy spring too.

Miztivin 2 points ago +2 / -0

Hm idk, I live way south so I may have more heat and humidity than yall do. I just planted mine directly in the ground and its been sweet potatoe city for me ever sense. I move them around, get different kinds, they all do well.

My soil can also be a factor. Every area is very different, even a couple of hours drive makes a huge difference. So I guess they aren't fool proof for everyone.

zippypinhd 9 points ago +9 / -0

I was a Master Gardener with the University of Maryland for 9 years. Through experience, I would suggest that you contact the Master Gardening Program in your area. It is an extension of your local university and is free. The area you live in will determine plant selections and planting times. Learn to compost. Very important! Best Book ever... Encyclopedia of Organic Gardening by J.L. Rodale and Staff. November 1971

Cheesecakecrush 9 points ago +9 / -0

Corn practially fails to NOT grow. I threw leftover kernels out when I had my garden fully planted, and they sprouted in some bare clay and are actually doing slightly better than the ones I made an effort to give the best start.

If you're gonna grow any peppers, I suggest buying seedlings from a garden center as their seeds are a nightmare to get to sprout. Once they're established, you can prune them back severely in winter onces the leaves die off, and they'll regrow in spring as they're technically perennial.

milab77 9 points ago +9 / -0

It depends on your location, but try to find out where the old farmers go to get their seeds.

What works easy peasy for me here is definitely potatoes and squash. Butternut squash are hardy. Also delicious.

If you want some greens that are easy, arugula (aka rocket.) They're a little spicy so the bugs don't eat them as much.

HebsFarm 2 points ago +2 / -0

They go to the Old Farmers Seed Store. Of course.

milab77 1 point ago +1 / -0

We have one in my town. It's an old hardware store that has been there for over a century. There aren't even any old farmers around here but at this store, guess what. Old farmers. I don't even know where they come from. It's fucking awesome. You wouldn't even know anything was different about the store from the outside though. It looks extraordinarily inconspicuous near a pawn shop and a used car lot.

HebsFarm 1 point ago +1 / -0

We have a 100 yr old hardware store too. For a minute I thought we were from the same town. But our used car lots are quite a distance from the hardware store, so, nah.

OldBlindSpudFarmer 8 points ago +8 / -0

Potatoes! Glorious potatoes! 🥔

HebsFarm 2 points ago +2 / -0

That username tho

photobuf 8 points ago +8 / -0

Plenty of gardening advise on YT. Yeah, I know but still good advise!

GreenRoar 8 points ago +8 / -0

In-ground things like carrots, beets and turnips are fairly easy to grow. If you cover them with straw, that might keep some of the critters from digging them up. And, it will provide the right kind of environment for growth. Squash is also easy as they don't need to be in a garden, just in the ground.

MaidInAmerica 8 points ago +8 / -0

Good advice in this thread, I’ll add

Sprouts are easy and you have food in a few days, low calorie but high nutrition. Sprouts can get you past the intimidation of growing food too.

Also check out permaculture gardening, some plants will come back year after year and once sowed are very little effort, tons of videos on YT. Just a few generations back people would get their rhubarb, garlic, dill, apple tree, mulberry bushes, etc. going and have a yard to forage.

We compost with red wiggler worms to produce fertilizer.

Melanias_Sunglasses 4 points ago +4 / -0

Yes please loop up sprouts. Very nutritious!

Quantachyon 7 points ago +7 / -0

Easiest... Amaranth. Harvest at about 10" tall Leaves taste like spinach, stalks have a texture like asparagus. They can take heat. (Quinoa is similar but for cold and high climates)

Easy Calories... Potatos in a tower.

Wheat, corn are also good calories.

inquimous 6 points ago +6 / -0

Amaranth is a good green with no effort, so is lamb's quarters.

Quantachyon 4 points ago +4 / -0


RagnarD 5 points ago +5 / -0

Amaranth seeds are also edible.

TCPatriot 7 points ago +7 / -0

Get all of the information that you can collect on foraging and hunting in your locale.

Scope out some foraging spots (for example where you can find lots of cattails).

If we have a famine many people will starve for walking right past valuable nutrients.

MAG768720 7 points ago +7 / -0

calorie efficient

No plant will ever be as efficient as animals, when it comes to getting protein, fats, vitamins, and minerals, which are the only things we need for good health.

Grow animals.

Here is a guy who did an experiment to only eat broccoli for one week.

The results were so horrible that he damn near died.


ALL plants have little to no nutrition for humans (cows do just fine on grass, but we can't). It's not just broccoli. Why do you think Bill Gates wants to you eat your plants -- even fake meat plant foods?

tattletalestrangler 2 points ago +2 / -0

I believe you are correct. Though not sure how easy it is to grow animals. Chickens, I'm guessing, would be the easiest. Others you probably need a bunch of land to support.

I remember something Otto from "Alaska, The Last Frontier" said. He raised cattle to feed his family. He said:

I turn grass into steak.

Mary911 2 points ago +2 / -0

So far, I have seen 2 of the fattest rabbits in my front yard, and several deer roam the woods behind and beside my house. There are plenty of squirrels in the trees as my yard is basically Oak trees. So guess what I will be having for dinner if the Need calls for it?

farmforfreedom 2 points ago +2 / -0

Can confirm. I grow vegetables for a living. I live by the rule of don't get high on your own supply because vegetables don't nourish my body from the abuse I put it through farming vegetables by hand with no tractor and no sprays. Meat, eggs, dairy are real food, vegetables are vitamins and minerals.

Neverstoptrumping 7 points ago +7 / -0

Plant once and done

1.) Asperagus! Also has all the vitamins to fight cold and flu ("covid") sunny spot

Plant it with with the roots spread out usually on a little dirt arch mound underground to help spread/branch out the roots and dust cover so the top is just dusted. Three years of growth before you cut. Never have to plant it again and get 40 years out of it. When it grows it has a stalk and then looks like a fern... don't weed out the ferns that will give you better growth.

2.) Rehubar you can basically plant in sand and comes back year after year. Only edible thing is the stalk. Sunny spot Plant it just incase you need food...who cares if you don't need it. Easy cheap

3.) Plant strawberries, black berries, raspberries. Just put them on your woods edge or fence or boarder in the sun and let it spread. House protection and fruit.

Yearly planting 4.) Any sprouted potatoes plant them in the soil about an inch down. Do it in a pot harvest in the fall. Probably the easiest way for newbie. If you see little balls red yellow white under the leaves...potato bugs..cleans them off and check each day. Bucket of water under the leaves and flick the bugs into it to kill them. You can store potatoes in a cool dark place. You have to prep them so they harden the skin for storage.

5.) Get a plant of cherry tomatoes. Do not start from seed. Some areas the growing season isn't long enough and you are already to far behind to try and grow them from seeds. If they are on your porch you can always look at them for worms and pick them off and no need for sprays.

Bonus 🐔 Definitely a fence if you have chickens because they will eat your garden up. Open the fence after harvest and let the chicks work the soil.

If you finally got your two chickens you can do a run around your garden to limit bugs 😉

deleted 6 points ago +6 / -0
manxom 6 points ago +6 / -0

bush beans (easier to manage than climbers), beets, zucchini (pick them small and you can use them for many more things--it also encourages the plant to produce more), pick some other squash. radishes are fast. dandelions. put some herbs around the outside to damp down the smell for the critters.

manxom 8 points ago +8 / -0

oh, and find some carpet on the side of the road. cut it into strips and put it between the rows. cuts down the weeding and holds in the moisture. old carpet won't have much chemical left to leech. can be reused for several years.

TQQDLES 6 points ago +6 / -0

You can replant celery hearts as well as green onion bulbs. I know specifically with the celery hearts you just put the hearts in a bowl of water, wait for them to start sprouting and plant them, basically the same applies to green onions.



Mary911 2 points ago +2 / -0

I just set mine in the flower bed behind the back porch. I didn't plant flowers in there this year. So I spread a bag of cow manure and planted a few radishes, a grape tomato plant, 2 bell pepper plants and so I decided why not. I took the heart of a romaine lettuce and the heart of a celery and a sprouting mushy onion from my bin and put them in the bed with the radishes etc. The romaine has sprouted up through the middle, the onion has shot a couple of large sprouts through and the celery has flowered out and I believe will recrop. I got this off of youtube on how to replant garden veggies. Everyone needs to give it a try. They really work. Thanks for the info and spread the word. Every little bit helps.

deleted 6 points ago +6 / -0
Winteralert 6 points ago +6 / -0

I don't know anything about calorie effeciency. I do know if you put a green bean seed in the ground, you will get green beans, with very little effort.

ToxicLibertyism 6 points ago +6 / -0

What is easy to grow for one person, is impossible for another. It all depends on your garden environment. Soil, temperature, climate, quantity of sunlight, and, how much land space you have to allow large plants/trees to grow. It also depends on what you like to eat, too. My advise for you is to first figure out what kind of growing environment you have to work with, then figure out what kinds of plants will work for you.

Squishyburr 5 points ago +5 / -0

Taters, zucchini, cabbage (red and green), kohlrabi, brussels sprouts, celery, tomatoes, peas and beans are by far the easiest. Same goes for chives and herbs in general. I had good luck with eggplant and spicy peppers as well.

Broccoli and cauliflower for me is hit or miss. Broccoli loves bolting on me for reasons only it knows but then going into fall it’ll be super happy and grow non stop.

I find corn can be super bitchy when young if your soil isnt quite right. Once it gets older it doesn’t seem to care as much anymore. Also takes a lot of nutrients out of soil.

Onions, carrots, root veggies in general can be tricky depending on what soil you have. Taters on the other hand for some reason don’t seem to care much about it despite also being a root veggie. Loose, dense, clay… it’ll grow.

Be prepared for slugs… hate them so much!!!!!!!!!

Jgouch8408 5 points ago +5 / -0

Potatoes 🥔!

Qlue 5 points ago +5 / -0

I recommend growing in containers and learning how to manage your soil. Gardening is essentially learning how to take care of soil. If you take care of your soil, it does all the hard work and you can grow anything aka become a green thumb.

justThisGuyYouKnow 5 points ago +5 / -0

Potatoes definitively.

DLangley 5 points ago +5 / -0

I just put in a garden. My soil is crap, so I have a couple of raised beds and everything else is in grow bags which are very cheap and I can move them around easy. Easy stuff to grow that I will freeze or can...spinach, zucchini, tomatoes, squash, several pepper varieties, collards. short term stuff like lettuce and sprouts will plant in intervals to have daily. I also have berry bushes and fig trees

5moreyears 5 points ago +5 / -0

Winter Squash, big yield, calorie-dense, super long storage and easy to grow

DontTreadOnIT 5 points ago +5 / -0

Potatoes, wheat, and corn provide the most calories per square foot.

Cowpeas are great if you're in a hot climate. Not the most calories but easy to grow, drought tolerant, and protein rich.

Gotrek 5 points ago +5 / -0


spaceforceltc 5 points ago +5 / -0

I literally just watched a video about this yesterday. The youtuber said beans, butternut squash, and potatoes. Reading the comments, other people argued for replacing potatoes with sweet potatoes because those are healthier plus you can eat the greens. Other commenters replied that the natives of North America subsisted on what they called the three sisters - winter squash, maize, and climbing beans. Those three crops apparently do not compete for the same nutrients from the soil. Others made the case for adding tomatoes.

anon82059 5 points ago +5 / -0

Look up the Ruth Stout method. Pretty much whatever you choose to grow will be easier with it.

huntfishpede 5 points ago +5 / -0

Amaranth is a great annual to have planted around the garden, let it go to seed before harvest and it will plant more for next year while leaving more than enough grain to be collected

cyberrigger 5 points ago +5 / -0

beans, butternut squash, corn, sunflowers, potatoes, onions, tomatoes

7Nick9 4 points ago +4 / -0

U can grow greens year round in the south..

tomthung 4 points ago +4 / -0


HighCountryAZ 4 points ago +4 / -0

There is a post re gardening I just saw today! Huge, so find it and save it, frens!

bigsix 4 points ago +4 / -0

Marigolds around the garden perimeter will keep rabbits out. Might work on deer too.

Jedbone 4 points ago +4 / -0

Nice post I just started trying straw bale gardening So far very simple and no weeding

dontdrinksoy 4 points ago +4 / -0

Wheat is easy to grow.

CaJuN-Polak 4 points ago +4 / -0

Tomatoes, definitely. Mine re-grow every year and I let the grass takeover where i used to grow them. Every year, though.

Cherry tomatoes grow like crazy and are much more likely to not go bad on the vine while you wait for them to ripen. They ripen quickly so you can likely pick quite a bit for snacking every day.

Blackberries grow wild, to the point where they will get out of hand if you don't groom them. Lots of berries for snacks - little work.

Hortance 2 points ago +2 / -0

Don't plant berries of any kind where you don't want birds. And bird crap.

THELEADERSOFMEN 4 points ago +4 / -0

I have a question about sweet potatoes. Grew them one year and had a bumper crop. But not knowing anything about long term storage, I cut them up and froze most of them. When thawed they were kind of weird, I remember a sort of white sap coming out of them, it reminded me of paste. So how do you prep them for freezing or canning?

aryaba 4 points ago +4 / -0


Get some good quality soil, some seed potatoes and a container. Make sure the container can drain itself easily and is very large and deep.

As the potatoes grow, add more soil. By the end of the season you'll have a container chock full of potatoes.

High calorie, long lasting and you can replant what you don't eat next year.

b472113 4 points ago +4 / -0

When we lived in rural Pennsylvania I remember a lot of the people would grow Jerusalem artichokes along with other staples.

RobFromTechServices 4 points ago +4 / -0

Depends on the dirt....you mentioned not wanting to grow cucumbers....but as far as dumb apes go....cucurbits are a safe bet for new farmers.....cucumber, squash, zucchini, cantaloupe. Keep them watered and lightly bury the leaf node. Spray with milk for powdery mildew. Spray with coffee or nicotine for bugs.

LibtardsGotTrumped 3 points ago +3 / -0

Plenty of good recommendations here so I'll just skip to advice on possible issues when growing a garden. When I was growing up as a child we had a garden every year and in the neighborhood we never had a single issue with rabbits or deers. I live about 30 miles away from where I grew up and I have to take steps to protect my plants from deers and squirrels. Deers will eat many of the plants new growth and especially flowers. What I do to keep them away is mix a 2 gallon pump spray with water, few table spoons of ghost pepper sauce, mint oil, and squeeze a few garlic cloves. Spray the plants once a week and after any time it rains. That will keep them from eating the plants. Another tip is to try and watering the plants by spraying them. Even though it usually doesn't matter early in the season there are times later in the growing season when it can cause issues spreading mold and fungus spores on the underside of the leaves. When the nights get a little cooler the plant leaves will develop condensation and that's when the issues can start occuring. Keeping the plants staked and properly spaced and pruned to keep good airflow will go a long way to keep plants healthy.