for anyone who cares literally at all I have to confess something. I've been struggling massively with addiction for a while now. I'm not exactly comfortable saying what the addiction actually is but I've been trying for months to quit. and every single time I try, I succumb to the temptation. I'm making a mockery of Jesus's sacrifice, and I hate it, and I want nothing more than to be able to overcome my addiction, but I simply don't have the strength. what am I supposed to do? it's really starting to feel hopeless.
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Think about how uncomfortable you are even admitting what the addiction is and then read the following words of wisdom-
Proverbs 28:13
He that covereth his sins shall not prosper: but whoso confesseth and forsaketh them shall have mercy.
I'm not asking you to reveal what your addiction is, but your discomfort is something you're going to need to address head on at some point.
What I can tell you, as somebody who quit smoking cold turkey after smoking 1-2 packs a day for 7 years, is that it's impossible to quit anything unless you truly want to.
In other words, you can't tell yourself something like this, "I really enjoy smoking but I know it's bad for me. It would be a good idea if I quit, because it's expensive, because it causes cancer, because <insert multiple other reasons>" and expect to be successful.
I know, because I tried quitting smoking several times and never made it longer than a couple days.
Then I did quit for about a month, and thought I had finally beaten the habit for good.
I ended up going to a bar and having a couple of drinks. Somebody offered me a cigarette without me even asking for one, and I foolishly accepted it. Even worse, the first thing I did after leaving that bar was to buy a pack of cigarettes and start smoking again.
I smoked for roughly another year or so before I actually quit for good.
How did I finally overcome my smoking addiction?
I was not a Christian at the time I did so. I was agnostic, and didn't really think too much about spiritual matters. With that being said, looking back on it now, I believe it was the Holy Spirit working within me that allowed me to finally break my addiction.
I came down with a case of bronchitis and it felt like somebody was sticking a knife in my chest when I tried taking a drag off a cigarette, so I put it out.
My lungs felt worse than they'd ever felt in my entire life and it was 3 days before they cleared up and felt like normal again. I didn't smoke a cigarette the entire time.
When I woke up on the fourth day, I instinctively reached for my pack of smokes without even thinking about it because my lungs felt better, but then I stopped myself.
My conscience or inner voice, which I now believe was the Holy Spirit speaking to me, had this to say-
"You haven't had a cigarette for 3 days. You've gotten past the physical withdrawal stage and you have no excuse. If you light up that cigarette, you're going to keep smoking, and one day in the future, you're going to wake up and your lungs are going to feel like they just did and they will feel that way every day for the rest of your life. Don't light it."
In the past, whenever I thought about quitting, I'd always smoked the "last pack" first. I would make excuses about how hard it was to get over the physical addiction and never made it more than 2-3 days without finally caving in, other than the time I quit for roughly a month, of course.
I put the cigarette back in the pack and threw the entire pack in the garbage, and I've never bought another pack of cigarettes again.
Here's a word from James, the brother of Jesus, that may help you.
James 4:1-10
1 From whence come wars and fightings among you? come they not hence, even of your lusts that war in your members?
2 Ye lust, and have not: ye kill, and desire to have, and cannot obtain: ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not.
3 Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.
4 Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God.
5 Do ye think that the scripture saith in vain, The spirit that dwelleth in us lusteth to envy?
6 But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble.
7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
8 Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.
9 Be afflicted, and mourn, and weep: let your laughter be turned to mourning, and your joy to heaviness.
10 Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and he shall lift you up.