Best thing to do? Make it clear that its all her responsibility since she made the decision without asking you.
But it helps to look at this from a 1000 ft view. This person seems to be a person who does not have emotional discipline to handle tough situations, not maturity required to be a equal partner in a marriage (Dont hate me for what I say, you asked for help)
My best advice is to first and foremost read up on bpd and ask yourself if your wife might be a bpd. Ruling that out is very important because if she is, there is really no hope of things getting better. (Sadly, my guess is that she probably is on the higher end of that spectrum).
Regardless, here is a question you have to ask yourself. If your wife happens to be a very toxic person who does not respect your feelings, emotions or well beings while she is impulsive and has no compunction painting you as the bad guy - and just hypothetically say that this is the immutable reality and there is nothing you can do to change her - what would you like to do going forward?
Also, I'm not sure man. I don't know what I want to do going forward. I want to raise my youngest. But she threw another curveball at me a week ago by saying she wants to move six hours away. And I don't want to move. I have no interest in moving. Yet this is somehow solidified now as she keeps saying to the kids "well, when we move, xyz". I want to be with them but I don't want to go there. I don't know anymore what to do with my life. Everything around me is crumbling.
Best thing to do? Make it clear that its all her responsibility since she made the decision without asking you.
But it helps to look at this from a 1000 ft view. This person seems to be a person who does not have emotional discipline to handle tough situations, not maturity required to be a equal partner in a marriage (Dont hate me for what I say, you asked for help)
My best advice is to first and foremost read up on bpd and ask yourself if your wife might be a bpd. Ruling that out is very important because if she is, there is really no hope of things getting better. (Sadly, my guess is that she probably is on the higher end of that spectrum).
Regardless, here is a question you have to ask yourself. If your wife happens to be a very toxic person who does not respect your feelings, emotions or well beings while she is impulsive and has no compunction painting you as the bad guy - and just hypothetically say that this is the immutable reality and there is nothing you can do to change her - what would you like to do going forward?
Also, I'm not sure man. I don't know what I want to do going forward. I want to raise my youngest. But she threw another curveball at me a week ago by saying she wants to move six hours away. And I don't want to move. I have no interest in moving. Yet this is somehow solidified now as she keeps saying to the kids "well, when we move, xyz". I want to be with them but I don't want to go there. I don't know anymore what to do with my life. Everything around me is crumbling.