First - You need to take control of your situation - Sounds like you keep running in circles trying to please your wife - whom doesn't seem interested in living in holy matrimony.
How ever you come to that conclusion - you need to do it...Heart mind and soul and move on...
Then you have plenty more hard choices ahead...But first you need to figure out that you need to take control of your life -
I will look back on this thread periodically
This is about the Electromagnetic Elevators used on the USS Gerald Ford They just got certified long after being in the fleet - He previously commented while as POTUS about cost overruns and missed deadlines of a couple years on the the Ford for the EMALS system that launch aircraft
- There is a deep money hole in shipbuilding for the defense industry with developing new tech when not really needed... https://www.defensenews.com/naval/2021/12/23/us-navy-completes-final-weapons-elevator-on-aircraft-carrier-gerald-r-ford/
Start making plans without any of her in consideration...If she doesn't move out... Fine, You move out...Stop wallowing in a bad situation -
Find a way..Its not that difficult to find another place ... Even if you have to move to another area - Just get your name off of the lease and give it to her
If you don't have enough money - Find a better job - Even if you have to move to another area...
My first wife wanted out, didn't really give any reasons and it took a few months figure out that there was no chance of reconciliation...I gave her everything and only took my cloths then left...started over
Its not easy, but it is toxic to stay in that situation..