She said, 'I'm home on shore leave,'

Though in truth we were at sea

So I took her by the looking glass

And forced her to agree

Saying, 'You must be the mermaid

Who took Neptune for a ride.'

But she smiled at me so sadly

That my anger straightway died

And so it was that later

As the miller told his tale

That her face at first just ghostly

Turned a whiter shade of pale

If music be the food of love

Then laughter is its queen

And likewise if behind is in front

Then dirt in truth is clean

My mouth by then like cardboard

Seemed to slip straight through my head

So we crash-dived straightway quickly

And attacked the ocean bed

And so it was that later

As the miller told his tale

That her face at first just ghostly

Turned a whiter shade of pale