I would like to say that ever since i was introduced to Q that felt this way but to be honest I believe I have felt this my entire life.
It seems as if my experiences no matter how nonsensical or dangerous were guided to make me who I am today for a reason.
Poverty taught me humility and compassion. While the rough neighborhoods made me strong. Dropping out if highschool to help the family taught me responsibilty, instilled a sense if urgency and kept me from being indoctrinated in the cult of higher learning(college really is a cult with leadership, ceremonies, gowns, etc.).
Later dehibilitating panic attacks taught me introspection, how to research, and not only that what you believe is your reality but also there are others such as the media which try to sculpt those beliefs and fears to manipulate you. It taight me to distrust psychiatrists and other mental health figures who kept trying to peddle drugs. (Note that i was able to cure my panic attacks in days by cutting out sugar and sweets and supplementing with magnesium,up to a gram a day. I still had a bit of anxiety from time to time but serious phobias literally disappeared).
Later autoimmune issues honed my research skills and introduced the basis of my conspiratorial minded thinking that continues to this day as i found it wasnt just mental health practitioners who were full of it but almost all doctors and physicians. Anyone with gut and skin issues can tell you that most docs say its all in your head.
All this time tho something never let me give up. Something kept me from going out with friends when they did their most stupid. Something kept my house safe while friends had their houses shot up. Something gave me all these crazy experiences and happenings all around but kept me alive and eventual pulled me through it.
I know its for a reason. I feel it.
To be honest just hearing a description of frazzeled.rip really jacked me for a while. All these dark places I go all impact me and sometimes pretty hard. I am not a rock. That's what Jesus is for.
TLDR.
Perhaps we were put through trials to prepare us for what is to come.
At times we may be questioning our ability to handle some of what we learn. You May question your faith and even reality itself but perhaps our experiences were guided to expose us and strengthen us for exactly these things so that we may stand strong in our convictions but be humbled by the truth enough to show empathy to those who had no guide.
Thank you lord Jesus Christ for the lessons and assists.
You are being groomed to live life.