I have a naturally distrusting personality which has always made religion hard for me, because when I have a serious question but get shut down for even asking in the first place, then it just ends up making me distrust the whole thing.

I do make a huge effort to understand who Jesus is, but ultimately this is the biggest speedbump in my journey, because I have so many questions that seem to make believers uncomfortable. As well as the bible itself, which we are told is the word of God and is perfect, but it was written by man, and man makes mistakes. Man also deceives. And since it was written over a vast span of time, and translated over a vast span of time, this seems to leave a lot of room (in my opinion) for mistakes or deceit. Every time I ask a believer about this, the answer I always get is "God would not allow that to happen." Maybe so, but that sounds exactly like something a human would say when their spiritual worldview is questioned. So how am I, a person who questions everything, supposed to get to a place where I'm comfortable that the bible is perfect?

I very much believe in God and in Jesus, but I don't feel like I "know" them because of all my questions. I also don't believe a human can answer my questions, so I just ask them strait to God. I'm still waiting for many of those answers, but I will tell you, some of my early questions, when I first came back to the bible, were answered for me instantly, and it shook me a bit, enough to scare me into being a believer. All though the way I was told to seek out those answers also makes some other believers uncomfortable, but it was a way of using the bible that a Chirstian woman taught me 30 years ago.