1 - Say something about helping young men get ahead in life

2 - Talk about deaths of despair and how miserable people are in the modern world

3 - Talk about how everything keeps getting worse year after year since he left office

4 - Have a concrete plan to address the cost of living crisis

5 - Make a skibbidy toilet reference to appeal to zoomers

6 - Avoid rambling, stay on topic and no Hannibal Lector

7 - Say something cool and superstitious like "I am the chosen one"

8 - Avoid playing defense whatsoever

9 - 2016 energy