The hardest part is the R&R.

That's when the whole 'Wow. This is actually true." shit /w the PTSD sunk in.

I literally can't relax. I can't have a beer. I can't even take my shoes off or sleep without one eye open. Just keep waiting for a shoe to drop because every time I did allow myself to take my eye off the prize - something happened.

Imagine knowing you have to piss. No big deal, right? Well - you have to wait. Who is going to make sure your kid doesn't climb into a cabinet and find a knife you didn't know was there? Who will make sure your kid doesn't run through a window?

Then you finally do pee. The second you shut the door to go - you hear screams. Now it's piss yourself and run, or finish and pray?!? Then you run out with piss on your pants cuz you had no idea if someone was dying or what and then your see your kid somehow got out the door - you fucking forgot the door cuz you had to piss and 3 kids were screaming and fighting. Now your kid is running up a busy street or fell into water outside your house.

And it happens every time you need to piss.

• Get over it.
• Work through it.
• Man up.
• You should have done this differently
• Your just in a phase it gets better.
• Be positive! It's only hard because of how you are looking at it!

Then take all of that, package it up, and hear 10,000 voices telling you to vaccinate your kid cuz 'it's safe' from the same virtue-signaling assholes that tell you that you are fucking up as a parent, as a husband, as a friend, as a bother, as an uncle, as an Anon, even, while none actually follow through and come watch your kid long enough for you to piss.

Feel it?

The hardest part is the R&R.

That's when the whole 'Wow. This is actually true." shit /w the PTSD sunk in.

I literally can't relax. I can't have a beer. I can't even take my shoes off or sleep without one eye open. Just keep waiting for a shoe to drop because every time I did allow myself to take my eye off the prize - something happened.

Imagine knowing you have to piss. No big deal, right? Well - you have to wait. Who is going to make sure your kid doesn't climb into a cabinet and find a knife you didn't know was there? Who will make sure your kid doesn't run through a window?

Then you finally do pee. The second you shut the door to go - you hear screams. Now it's piss yourself and run, or finish and pray?!? Then you run out with piss on your pants cuz you had no idea if someone was dying or what and then your see your kid somehow got out the door - you fucking forgot the door cuz you had to piss and 3 kids were screaming and fighting. Now your kid is running up a busy street or fell into water outside your house.

And it happens every time you need to piss.