I've been in our old home now for a week clearing out old crap, taking things to the dump, going to goodwill, cleaning, etc. Like I shared before ... 1.5 years of divorce discussions. Wife suddenly comes to me when she's about to move and says she doesnt want divorce and instead wants me to move there with them and us to all be a family. I was overjoyed, felt like prayers were working. Then while she's gone we're texting, I tell her I'm going to get a planet fitness membership. I get this nice response. Also note that I said "good night" because she previously said good night prior in the next when she was telling me that all I do is lay around (I literally work nearly two jobs so my time off , yeah, I like to lay and relax in bed and watch some tv or read the bible).

Now I have no idea where my life is about to go. Maybe my intuition and my gut on going car camping was correct and she was just trying to pull me out of that, like the matrix or something trying to keep me in this craziness loop.

I don't think I deserve to be with someone who speaks to me like this. Do you? Who says shit like this to a spouse when the other spouse says their ideas and goals?

I didn't respond any further to this text. And now I am, once again, in a position where I have no idea where my life trajectory is heading. What freaking timeline are we on? I feel like I'm going crazy. and honestly I've read that bipolar conditions cause others to feel like they are losing their sanity. Pretty sure that's what I'm up against.

Is it better to just pack my bags and hit the road, never reply again? Like what the heck.

EDIT: NOTE: My lease ends in ONE WEEK and I have NO WHERE to go. She had told me I was moving back in there with her, prior to her moving out (which was nice, because i prayed for us to be back together for over a year now ... but otherwise I was planning on sleeping in my car and doing airbnb). So now I've spent all this time getting this current home ready to vacate. Now all day she's texting me random things like "I've you're going to do XYZ, just don't move in here" (sleep past 9am on my days off because she wants to be "active" and "healthy"). Ya'll. This has come down to the wire. I don't know what the F I'm about to be doing. God help me.

Also, noteworthy, the money I had saved which was to buy myself a rooftop tent and a month's worth of airbnb costs have now gone to HER where she asked I pay the first months rent, which I sent to her. I put a lot of trust in her. I am constantly being misled. God... I don't know. I was just rejoicing two weeks ago about the glory of God and prayer. Why is he u-turning me like this? What am I supposed to gather? WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO GO. :(

I've been in our old home now for a week clearing out old crap, taking things to the dump, going to goodwill, cleaning, etc. Like I shared before ... 1.5 years of divorce discussions. Wife suddenly comes to me when she's about to move and says she doesnt want divorce and instead wants me to move there with them and us to all be a family. I was overjoyed, felt like prayers were working. Then while she's gone we're texting, I tell her I'm going to get a planet fitness membership. I get this nice response. Also note that I said "good night" because she previously said good night prior in the next when she was telling me that all I do is lay around (I literally work nearly two jobs so my time off , yeah, I like to lay and relax in bed and watch some tv or read the bible).

Now I have no idea where my life is about to go. Maybe my intuition and my gut on going car camping was correct and she was just trying to pull me out of that, like the matrix or something trying to keep me in this craziness loop.

I don't think I deserve to be with someone who speaks to me like this. Do you? Who says shit like this to a spouse when the other spouse says their ideas and goals?

I didn't respond any further to this text. And now I am, once again, in a position where I have no idea where my life trajectory is heading. What freaking timeline are we on? I feel like I'm going crazy. and honestly I've read that bipolar conditions cause others to feel like they are losing their sanity. Pretty sure that's what I'm up against.

Is it better to just pack my bags and hit the road, never reply again? Like what the heck.

EDIT: NOTE: My lease ends in ONE WEEK and I have NO WHERE to go. She had told me I was moving back in there with her, prior to her moving out (which was nice, because i prayed for us to be back together for over a year now ... but otherwise I was planning on sleeping in my car and doing airbnb). So now I've spent all this time getting this current home ready to vacate. Now all day she's texting me random things like "I've you're going to do XYZ, just don't move in here" (sleep past 9am on my days off because she wants to be "active" and "healthy"). Ya'll. This has come down to the wire. I don't know what the F I'm about to be doing. God help me.

I've been in our old home now for a week clearing out old crap, taking things to the dump, going to goodwill, cleaning, etc. Like I shared before ... 1.5 years of divorce discussions. Wife suddenly comes to me when she's about to move and says she doesnt want divorce and instead wants me to move there with them and us to all be a family. I was overjoyed, felt like prayers were working. Then while she's gone we're texting, I tell her I'm going to get a planet fitness membership. I get this nice response. Also note that I said "good night" because she previously said good night prior in the next when she was telling me that all I do is lay around (I literally work nearly two jobs so my time off , yeah, I like to lay and relax in bed and watch some tv or read the bible).

Now I have no idea where my life is about to go. Maybe my intuition and my gut on going car camping was correct and she was just trying to pull me out of that, like the matrix or something trying to keep me in this craziness loop.

I don't think I deserve to be with someone who speaks to me like this. Do you? Who says shit like this to a spouse when the other spouse says their ideas and goals?

I didn't respond any further to this text. And now I am, once again, in a position where I have no idea where my life trajectory is heading. What freaking timeline are we on? I feel like I'm going crazy. and honestly I've read that bipolar conditions cause others to feel like they are losing their sanity. Pretty sure that's what I'm up against.

Is it better to just pack my bags and hit the road, never reply again? Like what the heck.

EDIT: NOTE: My lease ends in ONE WEEK and I have NO WHERE to go. She had told me I was moving back in there with her, prior to her move. So now I've spent all this time getting this current home ready to vacate. Now all day she's texting me random things like "I've you're going to do XYZ, just don't move in here" (sleep past 9am on my days off because she wants to be "active" and "healthy"). Ya'll. This has come down to the wire. I don't know what the F I'm about to be doing. God help me.

I've been in our old home now for a week clearing out old crap, taking things to the dump, going to goodwill, cleaning, etc. Like I shared before ... 1.5 years of divorce discussions. Wife suddenly comes to me when she's about to move and says she doesnt want divorce and instead wants me to move there with them and us to all be a family. I was overjoyed, felt like prayers were working. Then while she's gone we're texting, I tell her I'm going to get a planet fitness membership. I get this nice response. Also note that I said "good night" because she previously said good night prior in the next when she was telling me that all I do is lay around (I literally work nearly two jobs so my time off , yeah, I like to lay and relax in bed and watch some tv or read the bible).

Now I have no idea where my life is about to go. Maybe my intuition and my gut on going car camping was correct and she was just trying to pull me out of that, like the matrix or something trying to keep me in this craziness loop.

I don't think I deserve to be with someone who speaks to me like this. Do you? Who says shit like this to a spouse when the other spouse says their ideas and goals?

I didn't respond any further to this text. And now I am, once again, in a position where I have no idea where my life trajectory is heading. What freaking timeline are we on? I feel like I'm going crazy. and honestly I've read that bipolar conditions cause others to feel like they are losing their sanity. Pretty sure that's what I'm up against.

Is it better to just pack my bags and hit the road, never reply again? Like what the heck.