Alternate headlines: "The food shortages predicted by the prepper conspiracy prophets of yesterday have now officially been proven true. Food shortages are a reality, and it was all planned out years ago by a vast international conspiracy that intends to do much worse. Accept your 'new normal,' and like it little peasants."

Alternate headlines: "The food shortages predicted by the prepper conspiracy prophets of yesterday have now officially been proven right. Food shortages are are a reality, and it was all planned by a vast international conspiracy that intends to do much worse."