I think you just have a lot of trouble saying “go” and “through” separately. I had no problem, plenty of others seem to be doing fine as well
You’re certainly free to take artistic liberties with rhyme and meter, I’m not saying you can’t. But every version that was shared has the same rhyme structure and same meter. They were all consistent and flowed smoothly.
Yours doesn’t.
If you want to record yourself saying it out loud, go for it. But until then I don’t think anything that you type will change the fact that you’re version varies greatly from the others people shared, in that it’s awkwardly paced and doesn’t have the same structure as every other stanza shared.
Take care man. Learn from your mistakes. I’m not trying to say that to be a dick, I mean just use time to reflect and learn what people are trying to tell you. And probably how to say “go” without saying “through”
I think the whole “go through” issue is a you problem.
I think a comma certainly would have helped you, but for anyone else seeing the fact that “will go” rhymes with “dildo” makes the version much easier, cleaner, smoother, and better. Your version is clunky and awkward
I think you just have a lot of trouble saying “go” and “through” separately. I had no problem, plenty of others seem to be doing fine as well
You’re certainly free to take artistic liberties with rhyme and meter, I’m not saying you can’t. But every version that was shared has the same rhyme structure and same meter. They were all consistent and flowed smoothly.
Yours doesn’t.
If you want to record yourself saying it out loud, go for it. But until then I don’t think anything that you type will change the fact that you’re version varies greatly from the others people shared, in that it’s awkwardly paced and doesn’t have the same structure as every other stanza shared.
Take care man. Learn from your mistakes. I’m not trying to say that to be a dick, I mean just use time to reflect and learn what people are trying to tell you. And probably how to say “go” without saying “through”
I think the whole “go through” issue is a you problem.
I think a comma certainly would have helped you, but for anyone else seeing the fact that “will go” rhymes with “dildo” makes the version much easier, cleaner, smoother, and better. Your version is clunky and awkward