I'm a wife. I can say I prefer when my husband leads yet still have a hard time submitting sometimes. It can pay to think of direct and simple was of just listing your concerns, and then letting her think on it. She's probably the one in charge of the kids most, and I know that the allure of something that takes their attention and gives mom a break can be so big. I think maybe a compromise that might prove your point could be good. Perhaps you can ask her to make them get off all social media for a week, tell her you know it will be hard (and plan to give her an hour at least to herself sometimes midweek) and then see how they change. I bring it up because our own kids used to be SO screen focused and our older girl used kids messenger back when I was using Facebook and got pretty well addicted to it. Since myself and my husband left social media, so there was no access, the kids have really both stopped using their tablets much at all. It's partly a leadership thing: they saw parents feel better and have more fun and be more attentive without the screen. And it's partly that kids brains are so plastic that once you take away the addictive thing, they repair to health quickly. Now our kids play Barbies or do art or drive me crazy begging to get outside all day long instead. So, long story short, a social experiment might be worthwhile. Once she sees manners and attention spans improve and anxiety go down because of less stimuli, she might be more open. Also, we take our kids outside at home or to parks that are wooded and calm at least a few long hours a week. Children today lack the biorhythm stabilizing effects of being out in God's world.