I’m sorry i don’t mean to meander about my personal problems here. I know it’s not the place for that. But i just don't know where else to turn. I found out my significant other has been cheating for two years. I threw him out and am leaving but i feel like i have Stockholm syndrome and feel like I’m the one ending it by leaving. He hasn’t expressed wanting to fix things, only says he isn’t sure what he wants and knows I won’t get over it and doesn't want to live miserable forever. He’s been verbally abusive and sometimes physically as well. Im just so lost and hurt. I feel like its somehow my fault, and even though I know I should leave am finding it difficult to let go. If you all can keep me in your prayers, that would mean the world to me. Thanks in advance, I cant see from the tears so I’ll just say wwg1wga.
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My friend, I have been in your shoes and I know exactly how you feel. I'm amazed he didn't try to blame it all on you. Most of the time that is what they do. Sometimes you can't see the forest for the trees. Mine started taking a shower, getting dressed nicely and wearing cologne when he got off work just to go have a "beer" with the guys. That was so unlike him as most guys would simply stop off straight from work to grab a beer without worrying what they looked and smelled like.
Then he started not wanting to touch me or even let me touch him; which I found to be not normal as we often hugged each other or kissed in passing each other in the house. That's when I started noticing that something just wasn't quite right. Funny how most all your friends know before you do. The woman is usually the last one to know.
I will state that if he is verbally and physically abusive, YOU do NOT deserve that. The Lord did NOT put you on this earth to be abused or mistreated. You are a Child of God. And God has not forsaken you. I know your heart is broken. I know you can't sleep or eat. I know your mind is filled with nothing but thoughts of "what happened." But if you pray, and you continually pray to God to help you with this, whether you want him back or you simply want to let him go and find the man God has chosen for you, PRAY. Psalm 34:18 "The Lord is near to those who are brokenhearted; he saves the contrite in spirit.
I prayed continually for mine to return and I have a wonderful testimony about it that will send chills down your spine; all because I PRAYED FOR FAITH. But this is not about me; it is about you. I pray that you will find the strength, courage and willpower to do what you have to do in this situation. I pray that you continue to follow the Lord and pray to him for guidance. And I pray that if you do not attend a church; find one that you fit in with and meet others who will help you through. Keep yourself busy and try not to dwell on it. I know that's easier said than done. And a friend of mine told me something once that holds true, "A MAN ALWAYS WANTS, WHAT HE KNOWS HE CAN'T HAVE." They always want the other woman until they realize that the woman they loved before acts as if she no longer wants them. This actually works 90% of the time, but it is up to you whether you want to do this or not.
But my best advice is to Pray, follow the Lord and do what he asked you to do. He will not steer you wrong. He has a mate picked out for you, and you will know it for sure when the time comes. I hope this helps you and I will be praying for you my friend. I know you are hurting. God bless you and if you need someone to talk to or pray with you at certain times, if I'm on here, seek me out and I will personally pray for you on a private post. God bless you again my friend.