I just need some prayers for my marriage. Just had a loud long fight with my wife. Some stuff came out that cant be put back in. We have 3 kids masked in school for 1.5 years. I am nearing my precipice. I dont know what to do, she is stuck in the go with the flow it will end soon. I know it wont. Our problems go back further than covid, I can see the societal brainwashimg effecr her, I have pointed out instamces, there is no listening just emotions.
She is Christian, but I dont know how much she looks to God for answers. I pray daily, many days multiple times.
I dont know I am rambling just dont know where to go with this, too many details to discuss, married for over 20 years. Please pray for my family.
Are you unleashing your frustration with the state of the world on your partner and best friend? You pledged your love and loyalty for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do you part.
Apologize. Wrap your arms around her (she may resist for a moment if you hurt her feelings with cruel words), and apologize. She’s your beloved, the mother of your children. Humble yourself, apologize, and ask for her help in being a better support to her.
I also recommend spending a few dollars on the book “Men are like Waffles, Women are Spaghetti”. Very helpful.
Good luck.
thanks for your thoughts. I feel her words were worse than mine, but she only hears mine. It is very hard for me to express love when I dont feel loved. I am sure this problem goes both ways.
I am sure you are right, but the problems seem deeper than an apology.
it's a mess, isn't it. do this before you go to sleep: take this heavy burden - the pain, the hurt, despair, uncertainty, regret, frustration, unfairness, the loneliness - everything that has got you to this precipice, and hand the whole burden to Jesus. don't worry about your wife. He's got a plan for her too.
when you ask Him to take your burden, be ready to receive His in exchange - "For My yoke is easy and My burden is light."
guaranteed, when we're at the end of our rope, when we've run out of ideas, when there seems no way out, our Father and His Son conspire to deliver us to a new path forward -- the thing that is best and right for you and for each and every person involved as well. it's easy for Him. and He will make it easier for you.
Always start with a humble apology.
This is about more than an argument - this is about whether you stay married, which means another man (or evil stepmother) potentially hurting your children, and you dying young because married men (not divorced ones) live longer.
Start treating her like you did when you were trying to convince her to hitch her wagon to your star - you are a man, so fix it, and if you don’t know how, LEARN.
you are righr, I need to man up and fix it. I feel like I have been just passively waiting. thanks