My fave involves a cruise ship stuck on a sandbar surrounded by sharks, just out of port and a minister, an athlete, a politician all jump in to swim to the Port Master's office and the sharks ate all of them; a lawyer gets up and says I'll be right back and sure enough he came back on the tugboat and everybody was amazed and asked how did you do this??? "well, a shark pulled me up to the dock as a professional courtesy"...