That the smoke is lifting and the true story of the Big Pharma is being revealed .. she is very depressed. Pissy all the time, withdrawn, angry … I think she regrets decisions she’s made but is too pigheaded to admit it. I’m not looking to rub her face in it, or belittle her, I want to offer an olive branch and bring her and her family under my wing again. Any advice? Is this happening to any of you?
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Look at it the other way. What's the payoff in the long run to satisfy your desire to explain exactly what a condescending disrespectful idiot she was? Cui bono? I'm having this same struggle myself except there still isn't even the opportunity for an in-person discussion. But after a good mental rant, I know it would be the wrong thing to say. If you can actually speak to her, my advice is stick to weather and food.
Sounds like you want to be able to talk and be fond as before. But you don't want to be taken advantage of. Those are both reasonable desires. Maybe even good principles or ground rules for interaction. She may feel the same. You were grateful for the acceptance of relatives, you have to talk to each other for that. Possibly there are old patterns of discussion that need revising..