This ties right in to awakening and realizing that the “women’s liberation” movement in more recent times has merely been a psyop, meant to separate children from their mothers’ influence and presence. Women from the Boomer generation right on down to Gen Z have been told since childhood “get your education, start a career, get married, be a mother. You can do it all and have it all.”

I am the 30-something grown child of a Boomer woman with said education and busy career, and no, you cannot fucking do it all and have it all. My entire life has been impacted by that lie, and the resulting necessity for two incomes to even think of staying above water.

As a result of never seeing my mother for entire days sometimes during my childhood and teen years (not her fault at all, life is expensive and she & my dad did what they had to do for us kids), I have rebelled SO hard against that notion—and caught an incredible amount of flack for it from FAMILY of all people.

I had the grades, the test scores, the accolades and awards, athletic prowess, EVERYTHING…and then as I grew older and went off to college, I inexplicably fell apart academically. I had no drive. I didn’t care. I flailed about from major to major, considering the military even. It took many years to realize just how profoundly I had been affected by my mother’s absence, and that excelling in college and having a career meant my own future kids would suffer that same fate.

I have never been unloved, neglected, hungry, or abused. Other than missing my mom all the time, I had a magically fun and safe childhood, running wild with cousins and friends before technology chained us to couches and beds.

I am living proof of just how important having mom (or dad!) around all the time is. I’ve been impacted for a lifetime by my childhood, even though it was filled with love and all my needs & wants met. And I have chosen to sacrifice the big house, fancy cars, and constant vacations so many of my peers strive for to simply BE THERE for the little one growing inside of me. Thankfully my husband is fully on board, and makes plenty to offset my smaller secondary income.

Whether they’re working from home or staying home, one parent should be with the kids and available to them at all times. Because I am not bringing life into this world just to hand him or her to strangers so I can “have it all”. That lie has pulled mothers away from their children for three generations now, and it ends HERE.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.