The meeting went like this: “So I know you’re all upset Elon Musk wants to buy all of Twitter. I know I know, Sue can you hand that tissue box around? Thank you. So everyone I know it’s a hard time right now and you all have the right to be upset. But I want you to know we are all strong and we can handle any difficult task, especially resisting Elon’s offer! Yes thank you yes but hold the applause please until the end. Yes thank you. Love you, yes.

So you know I am with you all to resist, that’s why we need to be strong in this next arduous task. Tomorrow, U-Haul is brining us all the boxes we need to pack each of your sorry DemoLib asses offices up! Because we agreed to sell and YOU’RE ALL FIRED!!! Okay have a great weekend, plenty of suddenly free year passes to GroomerLa….. uh I mean Disneyland for all of you. And I’m off to Carmel to enjoy my new bonus beach house. Bye everyone and thank you. Oh and HR will help with those letters of recommendation.” 🤣🤣🤣