Greetings - mid-30s gay man in the midwest here, sharing my story so far. This has been one of the worst experiences of my life. I'm married and we have a young child. Fortunately my husband was able to get the vaccine, and I'm isolated, but am in a deep deep depression that I may have put my family at risk. I feel like a failure of a parent as my husband is now doing 24/7 childcare and the house work. I can't hold my child or give them a hug and I feel broken. Incredibly depressed, just sleeping all day, doesn't make it any better.
July 16 - went to a bathhouse for some random sex with husband's permission. didn't think monkeypox was a concern at the time, I think the CDC was reporting fewer than 10 people in our entire state had it.
July 27 - got a low grade fever. assumed I had COVID and started testing daily, all of which were negative
July 28 - noticed what I thought were hemorrhoids, which aren't unusual for me.
July 29 - saw a painful white canker sore under my tongue, which was strange. Assumed it (and the hemorrhoids) were from stress. Developed a sore and swollen throat.
July 30 - went to a CVS minute clinic, where they tested me for COVID and strep, both were negative. Assured that I probably picked up some random virus, drink some gatorade and take some ibuprofen.
July 31 - the ibuprofen really helped the sore throat, and I felt like I was getting better, except the hemorrhoids were getting worse. Bowel movements felt like trying to pass a broken lightbulb. I bought some preparation H suppositories which didn't really help.
August 2 - noticed some bug bites on my wrists and ankles, pretty normal for me. I'm always getting bit by mosquitos and thought nothing of it.
August 3 - read up on monkeypox and started freaking out. Called my PCP (they didn't call me back). Called the public health department, who called my PCP, then told me to go to the urgent care. Went to urgent care and got swabbed. They looked at my butt and said there were no visible lesions there, just looked uncomfortable. Refused to prescribe any pain medicine other than ibuprofen. Said no discussion of TPOX until a positive result comes in.
August 4 - husband got the vaccine
August 7 (today) - still haven't received my test results. I've called the urgent care several times, am assured someone will call me back, and then nobody calls me back. Almost feels like it doesn't matter at this point - I just need to wait until these things scab over and fall off. Without a positive result, I can't get TPOX.
I'm really scared. My husband is so incredibly supportive, I'm lucky to have him. But this is going to be a marathon, and we're both out of gas. My depression is spiraling, I can't do anything but sleep. I feel useless and guilty. I'm afraid for my child.
In terms of sores (sorry, not going to share any pics) I feel lucky. None on my genitals or outside of my anus. Maybe have 15 total on my hands, arms, legs, feet, and torso. Plus two on my face. They don't really hurt, but itch a bit on occasion, except for bowel movements which are still incredibly painful. All seem to be in the pustule phase, so just hoping I don't get any new ones. Feel lucky that husband and I are fortunate to be able to take time off work, and my parents are able to help with the kid a little bit (which comes with a healthy dose of judgement).
If you're queer and don't have this disease - my strong advice would be to stick to established sex partners and chat about risk. You don't want this. It's terrible.
To the OP. Gay men have had their sex lives over-scrutinized by society for forever, so you dont owe anyone an explanation for how/why this happened to you. You were living a life of enjoyment in open communication with your partner and just happened to end up in this situation. Thats it.
What kind of BS is this?
No, you weren't living a life of enjoyment.
You were living a life of debauchery. Degeneracy.
And karma kicked your behind.
As a germaphobe, it's really hard to think people can be so willingly germy.
From the reddit link:
Greetings - mid-30s gay man in the midwest here, sharing my story so far. This has been one of the worst experiences of my life. I'm married and we have a young child. Fortunately my husband was able to get the vaccine, and I'm isolated, but am in a deep deep depression that I may have put my family at risk. I feel like a failure of a parent as my husband is now doing 24/7 childcare and the house work. I can't hold my child or give them a hug and I feel broken. Incredibly depressed, just sleeping all day, doesn't make it any better.
July 16 - went to a bathhouse for some random sex with husband's permission. didn't think monkeypox was a concern at the time, I think the CDC was reporting fewer than 10 people in our entire state had it.
July 27 - got a low grade fever. assumed I had COVID and started testing daily, all of which were negative
July 28 - noticed what I thought were hemorrhoids, which aren't unusual for me.
July 29 - saw a painful white canker sore under my tongue, which was strange. Assumed it (and the hemorrhoids) were from stress. Developed a sore and swollen throat.
July 30 - went to a CVS minute clinic, where they tested me for COVID and strep, both were negative. Assured that I probably picked up some random virus, drink some gatorade and take some ibuprofen.
July 31 - the ibuprofen really helped the sore throat, and I felt like I was getting better, except the hemorrhoids were getting worse. Bowel movements felt like trying to pass a broken lightbulb. I bought some preparation H suppositories which didn't really help.
August 2 - noticed some bug bites on my wrists and ankles, pretty normal for me. I'm always getting bit by mosquitos and thought nothing of it.
August 3 - read up on monkeypox and started freaking out. Called my PCP (they didn't call me back). Called the public health department, who called my PCP, then told me to go to the urgent care. Went to urgent care and got swabbed. They looked at my butt and said there were no visible lesions there, just looked uncomfortable. Refused to prescribe any pain medicine other than ibuprofen. Said no discussion of TPOX until a positive result comes in.
August 4 - husband got the vaccine
August 7 (today) - still haven't received my test results. I've called the urgent care several times, am assured someone will call me back, and then nobody calls me back. Almost feels like it doesn't matter at this point - I just need to wait until these things scab over and fall off. Without a positive result, I can't get TPOX.
I'm really scared. My husband is so incredibly supportive, I'm lucky to have him. But this is going to be a marathon, and we're both out of gas. My depression is spiraling, I can't do anything but sleep. I feel useless and guilty. I'm afraid for my child.
In terms of sores (sorry, not going to share any pics) I feel lucky. None on my genitals or outside of my anus. Maybe have 15 total on my hands, arms, legs, feet, and torso. Plus two on my face. They don't really hurt, but itch a bit on occasion, except for bowel movements which are still incredibly painful. All seem to be in the pustule phase, so just hoping I don't get any new ones. Feel lucky that husband and I are fortunate to be able to take time off work, and my parents are able to help with the kid a little bit (which comes with a healthy dose of judgement).
If you're queer and don't have this disease - my strong advice would be to stick to established sex partners and chat about risk. You don't want this. It's terrible.
Good luck.
What kind of BS is this?
No, you weren't living a life of enjoyment.
You were living a life of debauchery. Degeneracy.
And karma kicked your behind.
As a germaphobe, it's really hard to think people can be so willingly germy.
Or how the smell of shit leads to arousal, but there's that...