..when I feel like I would rather be one of the newly awakened, rather than a tired old war-horse who's seen all this coming for years.
I'd love to have the old energy back, the zeal, the righteous anger.
These days I just want it to be over.
Is it just me? I'll keep going, because that's what we do, but the pep has gone out of me, I feel wrung out.
I liken this to being in the dentist waiting room. You have a bad tooth that needs to be fixed. In the end you understand there will be much relief and the pain will be gone. There will be no more worry about this bad tooth, enjoy eating again. There will be hardship to endure and you are prepared. However, there you wait, seeing signs you'll be called soon and then the reception gets quiet again. Both eager anticipation and fear at the same time. This is what wears you out.