I love my girlfriend unconditionally. I must preface with that. There will be no end to that love.

We are both severely traumatized from our past (separate and together). We both have negative trauma responses.

Well, she ended up pregnant. I thought we were on the same page with it, that even if it comes earlier than expected, we will love that kiddo. Thats what she told me beforehand. She said she wanted to have my bebbies.

Well. She ended up pregnant, panicked, told me she got her period but actually went and got an abortion and killed our kiddo.

This wrecked me. She had a slight meltdown afterwards in regret. Wishes she never did it, wishes she told me she was pregnant, wishes she followed through. She admits she knows now that it would have been beautiful and she had no legitimate worries. All her worries were because her ex-husband traumatized her horribly.

Thing is, I knew. And I knew she was going to get an abortion. Don't ask me how. I'm trying to walk in faith and I assume God wanted the truth known. I begged her not to.

Her ex-husband almost killed her several times, threatened to dump her body in an abandoned mineshaft, pointed guns at her head, choked her out, etc.

She somehow got it in her head that I'd be like him, but him and I are opposites. I am a good man, she just let her trauma panic her and destroy something beautiful.

I'm just asking for prayers for her, mainly.

I did forgive her, and I'm not holding it over her head. I love her unconditionally, and theres nothing she can do that would stop that.

Thank you guys. You're family.

I should mention she is not godly. She's closer to being a pagan, doesn't believe in a single living God. So that makes this harder. I'm walking in faith and bearing the fruits of that faith for her to see.

I pray she sees it and recognizes it isn't me, that by my works alone I am not godly either. It is only through our Father that I am able to even try to be a good man. On my own, I'm sure I'd fail.