My son had to attend this dancing event at school. It was for a culture class he was required to take (nevermind he's a science and math major because he wants to be a dr, but I digress). The event had instructors showcasing the dances from different cultures. The students were supposed to participate by letting the dance teacher show them a dance, and then, trying it themselves. He tells me he had a great time and so did his buddies. I asked, oh, did you meet someone? He said, "Hell, no, that was the best part."
He said him and his buddies discussed the event ahead of time and decided they would not be asking any girls to dance. Instead, they'd dance with each other, alone, or an instructor, if asked. He volunteered that they (him and his group of guys) are not interested in giving these girls an ego boost. And they need to wake up to reality, which is that they're not special, most of them have nothing to offer except a future bill unequal to their value and a worn out private part. Poking the bear a bit I decided to ask, well, don't you want a future family? He said (and this is coming from the group of them, prolly 20 guys in the group) yeah, of course I do, but not from these girls...they're the bottom of the barrel. (We) sic know our value and (we're) sic out of their league. I'll find an Amish girl, or a Russian girl or someone else after I'm done with grad school, or not worry about it. I don't have a time clock on my fertility.
Back to the dance. I asked, how many people were there? He said, about 100. I said, how may were girls? He said, probably 60. I said, how many girls were asked to dance, or did dance? He said, zero. No guys approached any of them. They stood there and watched the guys for the whole event.
Before anyone gets up in arms my son is a mama's boy all the way. And I suspect many of his friends are. Very good students, respectful, hard working, athletic, and good looking (and I'm not just saying that cause he's my kid). The same can be said for his friends. Open doors, slide out chairs for the ladies types. So, still poking him a bit I said, what do you want in a woman?
He says (without missing a beat), First, she needs to look and act like a classy woman. I'm not interested in a circus clown (that means what he calls "danger hair" or exaggerated heavy makeup, or who dresses like a working girl. I'm not interested in something everybody's had). Second, she needs to know how to cook and clean. Because if I have to do everything myself, what do I need her for? I can get a dog for companionship, a maid for housekeeping, and a hooker for sex. I can even get a surrogate for my children. Third, she needs to be intelligent and know how to carry herself. That means reserved, disciplined, fiscally responsible.
I said, how do you expect to find that? He said, easy. You judge a book by it's cover. You can exclude a bad fit by checking their socials, looking at their friends, taking a visit to their house, and watching them generally.
I said, your whole friend group thinks this way? He says, we'd be stupid not to.
The idea of 40 college age men dancing with each other is gayer than anything else posted on this board.
Respectfully, it looks like you stumbled onto the secondary point they were making. They'd rather be thought of as gay than choose girls who are a step below that, lol.
Choosing to dance in the arms of a man is firmly in "is gay" territory rather than "thought of."
You have zero idea what they did or didn't do. You're just making assumptions based on a vague description. I think it was a bunch of guys goofing off. You think they're "firmly in" gay. Well, okay, so what? I'd argue they'd be better off gay than in a relationship with the types they're trying to avoid.
You brag about your son choosing to dance with men and then act shocked when people rightfully assume that he's gay. I'm honestly not sure what kind of response you were expecting here. I do agree with you, though, that's he better off living as openly gay than in a lavender marriage.