Dear America . . .
FIFTH GEN WARFARE
Congratulations from Canada!
I understand you are about to experience a mass exodus of has-been actors and musicians. Please . . . I'm begging you . . . block them from coming to Canada. We have enough of our own problems.
Perhaps just slip them into the upcoming illegal alien shipments to the south. No one will notice.
Please, just let Bette Midler and the cast from The View come in, please! Bette was supposed to drink Drano, but I don't think she went through with it. Thanks.
Sorry. We've got the space, we just don't have enough food.