In a stunning display of blind enthusiasm, millions of people have once again joyfully handed over chunks of their hard-earned income to a government that can’t even fix a pothole without a 3-year feasibility study and a $10 million budget.

“I love taxes,” said local taxpayer Doug Flanagan, adjusting his broken glasses held together by duct tape. “Every April, I get to donate to a system that spent $3 billion last year studying shrimp on treadmills.”

Meanwhile, the Department of Redundancy Department proudly announced a new initiative to streamline existing initiatives, which are already being streamlined by another initiative. “We’re very excited to reduce waste,” said a spokesperson from their fifth press conference this week, “which is why we’ve created a 12-person oversight committee to oversee the oversight committee.”

When asked why people still support this, experts pointed to a rare neurological phenomenon known as Stockholm Syndrome: Tax Edition, in which citizens develop affection for their captors, especially if said captors promise “infrastructure” every election cycle.

Public schools have also played a crucial role, offering social studies lessons such as “Why the IRS Is Your Friend” and “War Is Peace, Debt Is Prosperity.”

In conclusion: Government waste isn’t a bug—it’s a feature. And taxes? They’re just the subscription fee to a broken system people are too brainwashed—or too tired—to cancel.