Today is a bad day for you, fren. But tomorrow may be better. Just take each day one at a time. And seriously consider a move to the USA if you think you can manage it. Americans traditionally love Brits, so you would be welcomed and befriended. One thing the bible tells us that a good neighbor is better than a brother far away. If you've given up on your biological family, perhaps you can make a new life with a new family here.