I understand why you ask because I've seen some horrible women who mistreat their men. I am very soft spoken, meek and timid. I have a bit of a stutter too.
The man has a long history of abuse including with his mom, his parents, even a room mate. I think he's bi polar. Reasons why he'd hit me would be for making too much noise cleaning, breaking something in the kitchen by accident like a glass. In public, he wanted me to take out a loan at a bank and I forgot my social security number off the top of my head that day. The bank told me there was nothing they can do and he punched me in the lip on the way out where there were people around. I started crying and he told me to hide it when we went to the next place.
Why I put up with it, I have very low self esteem when I'm with other people. I grew up alone in a household and thought I deserved it all. I left him when he started threatening our new born baby because I had no choice. Even if I hated myself, she didn't deserve it. That was 9 years ago and I haven't dated since except for one or two when I pushed myself but I was too nervous it wasn't worth it.
On the plus side, despite that and going in and out of a womans battery shelter, it has helped me to recognize god and have faith in humanity. I chant the Jesus Prayer in Slavonic when I clean because it sounds so beautiful to me. I think going through all that has also brought be here and to see what's going on in the world.
however we get here, as tough as the road may be, what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger and better, if we want to become better. you have wanted to be better (hmm, isn't this Melanie's tag line?)
best wishes my fren, you seem very much at peace now with your psychological disposition
I understand why you ask because I've seen some horrible women who mistreat their men. I am very soft spoken, meek and timid. I have a bit of a stutter too.
The man has a long history of abuse including with his mom, his parents, even a room mate. I think he's bi polar. Reasons why he'd hit me would be for making too much noise cleaning, breaking something in the kitchen by accident like a glass. In public, he wanted me to take out a loan at a bank and I forgot my social security number off the top of my head that day. The bank told me there was nothing they can do and he punched me in the lip on the way out where there were people around. I started crying and he told me to hide it when we went to the next place.
Why I put up with it, I have very low self esteem when I'm with other people. I grew up alone in a household and thought I deserved it all. I left him when he started threatening our new born baby because I had no choice. Even if I hated myself, she didn't deserve it. That was 9 years ago and I haven't dated since except for one or two when I pushed myself but I was too nervous it wasn't worth it.
On the plus side, despite that and going in and out of a womans battery shelter, it has helped me to recognize god and have faith in humanity. I chant the Jesus Prayer in Slavonic when I clean because it sounds so beautiful to me. I think going through all that has also brought be here and to see what's going on in the world.
however we get here, as tough as the road may be, what doesn't kill us only makes us stronger and better, if we want to become better. you have wanted to be better (hmm, isn't this Melanie's tag line?)
best wishes my fren, you seem very much at peace now with your psychological disposition