I have been awake for 10 years but after discovering Q I feel like I have grown spiritually and just detached from mainstream society. Q is just different then what I knew in the past. The magnitude of our situation has made me just realize how superficial and fake mainstream society and culture is.
I used to be a big football fan. College and pro. I couldn't give less of a fuck about it now. I don't care about any sportsball now. Occasionally I'll watch some UFC and that's it.
Used to browse social media. Haven't been on Facebook for months now. Barley ever on Instagram. I used to post on snapchat a lot. Don't at all anymore. I still snap my actual friends but I don't look at stories or anything.
I used to be kind of a "chad" I hate using that term cause it makes me sound like a douche but I don't care about casual sex at all anymore. Have had opportunities to get laid I just don't care. It's just meaningless.
I don't even care about dating anymore. I have tried but trying to be in their fake world is impossible. Knowing what I know now it's like I am from another planet. This is truly a war for people's minds and souls. They talk about a new movie or show and I have no idea what they are talking about nor do I care. I don't know anything about new music either. Most of it is garbage and for the simple minded.
Not to sound like an arrogant asshole but it seems like many of us have outgrown normies and mainstream society. I feel like Neo in the Matrix every day trying to blend in with people who are human but in a completely different reality then me. I don't relate to them anymore and I only care about things that have a deeper meaning nowadays. Sometimes I have wondered if I am insane from all of this.
I just in many ways feel like a completely different person then I was before Q.
Are you happier as a result? For me that's hard to quantify: I'd have happily gone the rest of my life in sheltered ignorance, never knowing. But I do know. And I can't sleep. I've learned a lot, but much has felt slightly forced- compelled to learn rather than learning for love of learning itself. Stoicism would be an asset if I had it, but dogged perseverance I can do.
The happiness question is secondary to the answer, which I believe is that we are needed. We are required to hold ourselves in the position where our beliefs place us- our hill and refuge, where if things don't feel right- look around you- you are in good company- these people know your pain and joy.
The family in Times Square was happy until they got shot at. My point is that no one can truly be happy until everyone is happy. “Where we go one, we go all.” Or “you’re only as strong as your weakest link.” Or “we’re all in this together.”
Those statements are all so true. How can I truly be happy watching a football game when millions of children are suffering? It’s impossible.
Yes and no. I am glad my mind is free but this burden is like Frodo carrying the one ring but indefinitely. It did send me into a spiral of drugs, booze and easy women but I have grown out of it. Knowing the truth is hard cause you can't talk about it with anyone cause they think you are insane.
Eventually you stop caring what others think.
You know what you know.