Ever since I woke up, the system disinterests me. I haven’t worked in 3 years, (I want to!!! But I can’t find anything interesting enough to slave myself away for.) I’m barely interested in finishing my schooling or going to college. (I’m not a high schooler.) What are some ways I can get interested in life again? Because it is tearing me and my partner apart. He says I am too interested in fringe conspiracies and haven’t been focusing on helping them or myself. It is so hard to just go back to sleep and focus on life anymore. What I’ve found out during the pandemic has sickened me and honestly? It has ruined life in every single way. It is so hard to focus on what I need to do in this life when all we are in this life is slaves to the system. All I want in this life is be happy with my partner, go to work and just live my life.. but our way of life has changed forever. It is so hard to cope. It is so hard to get through this. I have anxiety, depression and BPD. The pandemic has made all of it worse. I can only hope we will come out victorious against our enemies. (Deep State/Illuminati/Luciferian Baby Blood Drinkers or whatever you want to call them.) This is literally BIBLICAL. I feel like I’ve had a spiritual awakening or that God is calling on me to be a warrior of Christ because I see the number 17 every day in everything I do. Anyone else? How do people cope with this madness? I feel like waking up has ruined my life. I can’t simply ignore the knowledge I’ve gained during the pandemic. I used to scoff at Hillary being a pedophile, Pizzagate and all of that. But now I can’t go back to sleep, I can’t just ignore all of the lies, deceit, how much they hate humanity, if the vaccine agenda will kill us all, my loved ones, my family. In another life, I’d want to take down the Illuminati. Or die trying. This world is sick. I want to know the truth and the full truth. Are there aliens? Are there demons? Are there angels? Is God real? Is he shining his light on all of us so we can use the light against the forces of darkness? Will Jesus ever come back? Are we Light Bringers? I have so many burning questions.
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Volunteer. Do good and bring light to others.
Start with animals (Humane Society, ASPCA, etc.) Focus on the animals and tune out all the people nonsense that goes on in these organizations (trust me, there is A LOT of people nonsense like power struggles.) The beauty of being a volunteer is that you can tell them to piss off if they try to drag you into the people drama.
Once you are feeling more whole and balanced, volunteer with little humans. As long as you can pass a background and finger print check, schools will let you volunteer.