I’m standing there in my shower tonight, the only one still awake because I’ve been fixing all the broken shit in my house that I overpaid for because Fuck Blaclrock and the deepstate. Anyway….. I’ve got a mean 100 yard stare trying to surmise what my life might be like had I just bought those bitcoins in 2011. I start scrubbin mah balls because, like Lori lightfeet, I care about hygiene. Well…. In that moment my favorite President pops in my head. I think about him for a few seconds; and, because it’s my new favorite holiday I start thinking about my favorite tweet of all time. I then move on to washing my armpits because it’s mildly sacrilege to scrub my balls while thinking of the one true Almighty. As I’m trying to untangle my pit pubes, a thought popped into my head; I’m gonna fuckin count the number of letters in my favorite part of my favorite tweet. And wouldn’t you god damned know it, 17.

What a wonderful World People. How many coincidences?