Let's start from the beginning. The earliest time I remember thinking like this was around May 2021. God, that was a long time ago. Then, I passed it off as mere delusion, and continued with life. September Octoberish. A girl I've known for a long time goes up to me in class and says, "Hey, you've always mainly had female friends. You look very feminine and act the part, your voice is really high and versatile, too. I think you'd make a great girl." Or something along those lines. A switch clicks in my brain. I spend days holed up in my room pondering about that thought. Could I really be a girl? Is such a thing even possible? What will everyone think of me? So I did the worst thing you could EVER do. I turned to the internet. Knowing the Internet, Google seems to have a leftist algorithm. All that came up were "symptoms" of "dysphoria" and trans help centers. I then made an even WORSE decision and looked at... Reddit. My god was that a mistake. Once again the same thing happens. I get very few if any opposing that one hivemind narrative that "If you feel you are and say you are you are." Must have been an easy target. I don't remember much of what happened after that. My brain reinforces those thoughts. I turn to my mother. I ask her about it and get a bit shut down. I retaliate. Little did I know she'd seen every episode of I Am Jazz, and knows the harm that comes with it. She had no choice but to "support" me. She for a very long time became the only person I was openly trans to. Then came the psychological pain. Often told not to tell anyone, come up with everything and fix everything wrong with you as soon as possible they said. They said I was the euphoria type, asked me to imagine myself as a girl, extreme high. (I still get that but that's just because I'm weird like that. So what if I want tits? Tits are great.) The community was incredibly sexual. I was like, what? 11 at the time? (Mental age estimated in 30-40s) I was being straight up told to MASTURBATE to the idea of it. Weirdly enough, the whole charade ended up somewhat well for me. I went on Omegle one night and noted the amount of people who could instantly recognize me as female, male, or neither. The responses were overwhelmingly female and indeterminate. Very few if any male responses. (I still "pass" pretty well but that's because all my genes are Mom's.) This flipped a switch. Again. I was begging for feminine things and learn how to be a "girl". This did not work, which I feel was a key factor. It's important to know that at the time, I was subbed to mainly trans and conspiracy-debunk subs. Continue all this pain for a time totaling about 8 months. 8 months of misery, psychological breaks, living in fear, hatred, intense spiraling emotions, echo chambers, surrounded by toxicity. My god was that traumatizing. It's also important to know I'm a sensitive person as is, and my autism turns that to 11. So this was far worse than the average person. One day I see this little Q upvote mark next to one of my conspiracy subs. After 8 months I've had enough, and after asking if I can just stop being trans, I was told it was impossible. So I tried anyway. Continuing, I was told it was dangerous (to go alone, take this!) to go there, as it had radicals, and racists, and bigots, and all the other bads. I asked the domain, and was expected to just know. It was at this moment Reddit did the only good thing it ever has for me, and some kind stranger gave me the domain, I go there, create this account, post about my story, nothing. That doesn't matter. My main focus is to forget anything was ever wrong. After less than a week, I was no longer trans, nor gay. I stay a straight male, with no guilt, pain, or really anything wrong. I have since recovered and am fine now. A lot of other things happened in that time frame that I deem not important to my story, and this is a massive oversimpification, I could go deeper but my mind simply does not allow. All repressed.

I hope you enjoyed reading this rant. Thanks for knowing my story. See ya!