All this advice about "healing" via masculine activities? Not every "man" has to go to the gym or do taekwondo to prove it? No, it begins between the ears. You were born a man- the fact that you've endured this abuse to the point of sharing it here on GAW proves such- a fine first step, but somewhere inside you obviously already knew.
My humble advice is, now that you're aware of the abuse, is to be who you are (or wish to be) and learn to embrace yourself. Know that you're mother likely suffered some form of early abuse- at the least misguided or even mentally ill? Forgive her (which usually requires superhuman strength) but, most importantly, forgive yourself for whatever guilt you have carried? Then maybe pursue a hobby which interests you, like say... the pursuit of Truth?
All this advice about "healing" via masculine activities? Not every "man" has to go to the gym or do taekwondo to prove it? No, it begins between the ears. You were born a man- the fact that you've endured this abuse to the point of sharing it here on GAW proves such- a fine first step, but somewhere inside you obviously already knew.
My humble advice is, now that you're aware of the abuse, is to be who you are (or wish to be) and learn to embrace yourself. Know that you're mother likely suffered some form of early abuse- at the least misguided or even mentally ill? Forgive her (which usually requires superhuman strength) but, most importantly, forgive yourself for whatever guilt you have carried? Then maybe pursue a hobby which interests you, like say... the pursuit of Truth?
You are surrounded by love here, fren