The fit is upon me. My spidey sense is tingling. Yet another thing to fear. I can't wait to see what expensive and ridiculous solution they have planned to help us. No doubt it will make someone obscenely rich while doing nothing but make the rest of us more poor and miserable.
Wait a minute . . . it's global warming! That's what swelled up my prostate and gave me a heart attack, not to mention tweaking my brain to make me think men shouldn't be in women's bathrooms. It has to be responsible for this, too, so I'll be on the lookout for the scientific paper that details how plastic particles, which fly malevolently around in the air like pollen, are pushed into the skin by warmness. That will likely convince me I should do something radical and depressing to change my lifestyle, which will, of course, include giving bookoos of money to rich guys to launder in Ukraine and in the U.S. stock market. I sure hope they don't pull out the mask thing again, but maybe it will work this time.
Too bad. I am a fan of being warm. But they say warmness is evil, so despite the fact that humanity prospered during the warm eras of its history with more food, fewer wars, and less disease, I will throw away all the well-substantiated evidence of that and believe them because, well, new science has apparently emerged, which Democrats and Socialists found under a waste basket.
Now we have plastic! Oh, the fear! But not to worry. I'm sure the Democrats and Socialists will cook up a way to get rid of all the plastic before global warming combines with it to turn us all into mannequins, bless them. Some people might starve to death because plastic is such a big part of food preservation, actually, a lot of people, but isn't that a small price to pay for the rest of us to be safe from the plastic?
Ohh . . . I think the fit is lifting. The twitching has stopped, and all I can think about is how stupid people are, sitting in their high chairs, craving the next bite of fear being spoon-fed to them on TVs, phones, and computer screens by evil politicians, evil news corporations, evil paid-off scientists, evil Hollywood stars with all the wit of a goldfish, and evil tech companies with mottos like "Don't be evil."
The fit is upon me. My spidey sense is tingling. Yet another thing to fear. I can't wait to see what expensive and ridiculous solution they have planned to help us. No doubt it will make someone obscenely rich while doing nothing but make the rest of us more poor and miserable.
Wait a minute . . . it's global warming! That's what swelled up my prostate and gave me a heart attack, not to mention tweaking my brain to make me think men shouldn't be in women's bathrooms. It has to be responsible for this, too, so I'll be on the lookout for the scientific paper that details how plastic particles, which fly malevolently around in the air like pollen, are pushed into the skin by warmness. That will likely convince me I should do something radical and depressing to change my lifestyle, which will, of course, include giving bookoos of money to rich guys to launder in Ukraine and in the U.S. stock market. I sure hope they don't pull out the mask thing again, but maybe it will work this time.
Too bad. I am a fan of being warm. But they say warmness is evil, so despite the fact that humanity prospered during the warm eras of its history with more food, fewer wars, and less disease, I will throw away all the well-substantiated evidence of that and believe them because, well, new science has apparently emerged, which Democrats and Socialists found under a waste basket.
Now we have plastic! Oh, the fear! But not to worry. I'm sure the Democrats and Socialists will cook up a way to get rid of all the plastic before global warming combines with it to turn us all into mannequins, bless them. Some people might starve to death because plastic is such a big part of food preservation, actually, a lot of people, but isn't that a small price to pay for the rest of us to be safe from the plastic?
Ohh . . . I think the fit is lifting. The twitching has stopped, and all I can think about is how stupid people are, sitting in their high chairs, craving the next bite of fear being spoon-fed to them on TVs, phones, and computer screens by evil politicians, evil news corporations, evil paid-off scientists, evil Hollywood stars with all the wit of a goldfish, and evil tech companies with mottos like "Don't be evil."
I love you.