Reminds me of the hilarious 'Stuart' skits on MadTV. Stuart, a little boy played perfectly by Michael McDonald, (a extremely tall adult male who as 'Stuart', wore rouged cheeks, big lashes, crossed eyes, a plaid shirt and a messy mop of hair).

His divorced, prim, mother played by the awesome Mo Collins, would always get into arguments with Stuart because of his misbehavior.

Whenever he would misbehave in front of other people, his mother would sternly say to him, "Stuart! What does Momma say?" He'd reply, "I don't wanna say!" Finally, he'd respond, "Momma always said....." and then he'd repeat some ridiculous and funny anecdote that fit the circumstances.

One time his response was this, "Momma always said, just because a woman has short hair doesn't mean she's a lesbian like Aunt Linda."

Here's a clip of one of the really funny skits if you've never seen it.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JPT-MEHrOFo&list=RDx3dpkcOPwZk&start_radio=1