About half a year ago I confessed to my church community that I am struggling with SSA and posted here on GAW. From there I have been in a 12 step recovery program called Re:Generation. First I must start with I still have this attraction and that is okay, but I am no longer acting on my flesh (No longer seeking Homosexual relations/Porn). I have been searching for the root of my sin nature and have found some connections so far. I did not feel wanted/desired or understood by men in my life growing up, and was sexually abused by a male cousin. Long story short, I see that I used sex as a way to gain that want/desire and understanding from men. Which I felt Wanted/Desired when I was abused. This is a huge eye opening link to what may be what started this sin nature in me. While I have not seen a change in my attraction, like I mentioned I am no longer acting on this sin nature of mine. God is 100% capable of changing this in me, I will not deny His power. But as say to my church family walking with me, I need to first be okay with the idea that I may never be over this attraction, never have a relationship, and never have sexual "gratification" again. This may be the thorn in my side The Lord uses to remind me of where he has taken me, or the thorn may be removed and I can have children and a family that I want to have some day.
I just wanted to give an update for those who have seen my previous post on here. For those who are still active in SSA I am not judging you, I love you all and pray God reveals himself to you as He has done to me. Im not asking for you all to do what I am doing but to just get to know the Father, Son, and Spirit.
Thank you for reading this, any and all of you. Keep me in your prayers. God is great and may His will be done, not my own.
Thank you, I just want everyone to know the Lord. This is the path He is taking me on, I know others in the program who have my attractions but that's not why they are there, and that's okay. I see that and understand that fully. I was like that a few years ago but God changed my heart. Love them just the same as does the rest of the church family I'm with.
What is this “power of love and light”? Are you referencing God? Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ? If so, then say His name.
Understand God loves you, He created you. The world shapes the brain. Sadly. If you choose to live in sin...we all sin unfortunately, but if your choosing to live in sin, understand God hates sin. All sin. There are no big/little sins. And, if you want to please God, you should hate sin, your sin and my own, as well. Like the OP, you should be fighting against your sin. To accept sin as a way of life, well...that’s risky in my view. I’d be interested your prayers. Personally I wouldn’t expect any blessings from God, nor He hear my pleas if I’m choosing to go directly against Him. But that’s me.
Just worried for you brother/sister.
Well said🐸