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You are lucky that the state didn't intervene and force you to put them in a home "for their own good." It happens, and in California, spousal separation is mandatory when one has dementia and the other doesn't. I believe the mandatory spousal separation is cruel.
Visiting nurses came in frequently to check on my parents. They were a godsend. They helped me get whatever I needed to take care of them, along with monitoring their health. They always told me I was doing a good job, so I had no fears of the state intervening. In fact, it never even crossed my mind that they would try.