It is easy for people to be judgmental when looking on the outside. In my own case, we had no choice but to put my dad in an assisted living. He was cognitively ok, but thanks to severe arthritis and rotator cuff injuries and a hand disorder that rendered his hands useless, he was, physically-speaking, a 200-lb four month old baby. I physically wasn't strong enough to get him in and out of bed, etc. And to make matters worse, he was difficult and uncooperative. For example, he was incontinent and would refuse to wear diapers and pee all over my furniture. My dad was also a drama queen and enjoyed starring the pot and creating problems. After I had enough, my sister tried, and she couldn't manage him, either. The assisted living facility we put him in was great in terms of most of the staff being loving and caring, but the bureaucracy of those places (much of the bureaucracy is mandated by the state) is a nightmare.