To all my friends out there who know what’s really going on… To all my conspiracy theorist friends…
Yes, sometimes it’s a curse and not always a blessing to be awake.
Awakening is the most liberating, alienating, excruciating, empowering, lonely, confusing, freeing, frightening, expansive journey.
If you find yourself struggling as you try to process all this insanity, you are not alone.
No one talks about the darkness that accompanies awakening, or the GRIEF. Not only grieving the life and illusions you once had but the realization that almost everything you thought you once knew, is a LIE.
The beliefs you’ve held, people you’ve trusted, principles you were taught- ALL LIES. Shattering illusions is RARELY an enjoyable experience.
There is a considerable amount of discomfort that comes with growth and the grieving process doesn’t stop there.
With these newfound realizations, you then find yourself grieving all over again. Grieving the loss of many relationships with people who just don’t “get it”. Feeling alone; being ridiculed and shamed, not only by the masses but for many of you, your very own family and friends too. Feeling like you no longer have much in common with the people you are surrounded by.
Struggling with carrying on bullshit, shallow conversations that lack substance with those who are still fast asleep.
Even feeling disconnected from your entire support system because they can’t see what you see.
Some even grieve the loss of their ignorance- because “ignorance is bliss” and reality is harsh.
Awakening can be a lonely road and you will often find yourself journeying alone.
There is no way to sugarcoat it- Awakening to the realities of this world is brutal. It will have you running through the entire gamut of human emotions.
You have to master the art of diving down the darkest of rabbit holes only to come out and still function in daily life, and that’s a skill people don’t talk about enough.
Some of you are struggling with feeling disconnected from family and friends, it’s as though they exist in another world.
Please know you are not alone, and not only are you not alone, you have an entire tribe standing with you.
We may be separated by miles, but we are DEEPLY connected; in purpose and in spirit.
Author unknown.
Before thinking you might lose your life if you split up with your wife, realize you may have more peace of mind living in a cardboard box.
Proverbs 21:9
It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.
Proverbs 27:15
A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.
If you and your wife are unable to find common ground, there's nothing you can do to stop your relationship from failing, either because you actually split up or because you become an empty shell of yourself and live a lie to make her "happy".
The fact she chose your anniversary date to threaten you was possibly a very calculated move on her part. You would know better than any of us if it was spontaneous or if she chose her words very carefully.
Matthew 12:25
And Jesus knew their thoughts, and said unto them, Every kingdom divided against itself is brought to desolation; and every city or house divided against itself shall not stand:
Not sure if you're a believer, but this verse may give you some comfort if you are.
Matthew 19:29
And every one that hath forsaken houses, or brethren, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, for my name's sake, shall receive an hundredfold, and shall inherit everlasting life.
And if you and your wife are both believers, you may just need to quit talking about politics and happenings with her if that's what it takes to keep the peace.
You can tell her, "I thought about what you said and I want to make this work."
Maybe save these discussions for when you're hanging out with like-minded friends.
Also, if you've been datefagging, you can truthfully tell her she's right and you've been listening to fools.
These words are very comforting. Thank You.