Powerful testimony: overcoming porno addiction
(media.greatawakening.win)
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Never mind what it does to the wife. After so many years of getting off to the visuals and the use of the hand it’s pretty close to impossible to finish off the way intended, in the wife. The male member becomes accustomed to only “working properly” with hand motion only. Natural intercourse doesn’t do anything for him anymore. And eventually the husband becomes so selfish that he realizes he can pleasure himself in a few minutes by himself and doesn’t have to put in the energy of pleasing his partner, that the wife becomes completely ignored. And the rare times he does decide to be intimate with the wife, because the wife cries and pleads for intimacy, it’s nothing at all like making love. It’s the husband trying to recreate with his wife whatever sordid scene he’s been watching recently. I love him and spent years trying to convince him to stop but I’ve given up now. And you can’t say oh the wife must not try to keep him interested. I’m the same weight from the day I married him and I’ve wanted intimacy a couple times a week since day one. But I never knew about his porn addiction for years and always cried myself to sleep over why isn’t my husband interested in me? I didn’t know I was competing with all the women on the internet for his attention. So yeah. Porn addiction affects the wife very much.
The “couple times a week” was compared to his once a month. Believe me I would do it every day.
^Ditto- everything you said. I married my husband without knowing about this problem, also. I agree in some cases the wife can be partially at fault for lack of taking care of herself, weight, low libido, etc-- but in my case, I discovered this problem about a year into our marriage, when we were having sex EVERY night. I was absolutely blindsided by finding HUNDREDS of pages of porn open on his phone when I picked it up to check the weather or something. In subsequent fights/discussions about this issue over the years, the blame has been put on me for being too busy, not going to bed on time, not being interested, lots of other excuses. I believed some of those things for a time, until I would fix whatever issue it was and find out it was still happening. Devastating all over again. Books, advice columns/info about this issue is just as devastating and hopeless. It took a lot of years for me to finally realize that it wasn't my fault or anything I was doing or not doing. All I can do is pray for him and love him anyway.
I meant to say, if I had not discovered his porn addiction when I did, in our extended "honeymoon" phase -- when there was absolutely ZERO reason for it to be happening-- I would have blamed myself much more.