Keep giving it all to God my fren. God bless u. So sorry to hear about your loses. I am here if u ever need a fren to vent to or have a prayer request. U can find any one of my post and make a request or PM me. We have also created a discord server as a sort of rally point for all the Christian's. No pressure to join just wanted to send u invite. Lots of people there are like u. Dont have a church in real life. We wanna fill that void until God guides them to a irl church. Love u fren God bless u.

https://discord.gg/sngRVxKtyU

Edit: I realise u said u dont do organized groups. We are trying our best to keep that whole vibe out. We are more of a family than anything. Not about a specific denominations rather we are about helping each other form personal relationships with Christ and come together as the body. Please pray on it. No hard feelings if u dont feel led to join. Like I said u are family now either way and I am here for u how ever I can be