Dec. 5th, 2022 3:44AM
I woke up with a sour stomach and felt lead to read my Bible and pray. I asked God what He wanted me to know, do or understand. He lead me to the first three chapters of Jeremiah.
In the first two chapters, God has the prophet Jeremiah tell the people of Israel about how they forsook and turned their backs on God to chase after foreign gods and idols made from their own hands and worship them instead of Him as a prostitute would and do vile and evil deeds. He told about how because the people turned away from God to do these things and only cried out to God for help when things got really bad, He withheld His blessings and His help and even the rains. They had neglected God otherwise as God wanted their devotion and their hearts. God wanted their love, obedience and a relationship with them all the time not just during their hour of need and trial.
Because the people had rejected God except when things got bad, God rejected them, for God is a jealous God and wants our whole hearts not just part of the time.
Chapter 3;3,4 Therefore the showers have been withheld and no spring rains have fallen. Yet you have the brazen look of a prostitute:
You refuse to blush with shame. 4)Have you not just called me: ‘My Father, my friend from my youth.’
It brought to mind something that happened over 32 years ago. I was in a date with an old boyfriend downtown Seattle. I had grown quite promiscuous and had been seeking the love I had so lacked and so desperately needed at home growing up as a kid with no guidance from an abusive home.
We were walking down the sidewalk holding hands when a homeless man jumped out in front of us from out of nowhere and began yelling at me. He kept repeating over and over.
“You’d better start blushing girl! You’d better start blushing!”
It made no sense to me then and he kept challenging my boyfriend to fight him and darting back and forth into doorways in front of us. We ignored him and continued walking away. As we were walking away from him, he yelled at me. “I’ve got nobody, nowhere, nothing!”
We just assumed he was either just another druggie or mentally disturbed or both. My own dad spent over twenty five years as a homeless alcoholic and would often go on yelling rants such as this, so this just like my dad made no sense to me at the time.
Just now though reading Jeremiah, it suddenly made sense. I think that man may have actually been a prophet who appeared as a homeless man so that I could relate and I missed it. I think he was telling me that I should be ashamed of my actions in how I turned my back in God, my first love whom I had chosen at just five years old.
I was so sinful in chasing my own willful lusts and desires that I had turned my back on God. That man was warning me. I didn’t listen and I paid the price. Over the next few years I lost one job after another, one boyfriend after another, three apartments, totaled my car, lost my first two pregnancies out of wedlock, had to turn to extended family for a place to stay and friends from church as I wasn’t welcome at my parents because I was my real dad’s kid not because of any crime, drug or horrible act though I had been diagnosed as bipolar when I was nineteen and I’m sure I was a handful and a half for my mom and stepdad with rollercoaster moods.
God wants our whole heart, love and devotion all the time, not just when times are bad.
Some of the things man turns to to replace God that steal away our live and devotion to Him and become idols are:
Idols made of wood, clay, metal and stone and plastic
Foreign gods and other religions
Celebrities-actors, singers, musicians, magicians, sports games and players
Fame
Lust, sex, abortion (sacrifice to Moloch)
Sexual immorality, perversion, depravity, homosexuality
Beauty in man’s eyes
Drugs and Alcohol, partying
Wealth, money
Fancy buildings, homes and cars
Jewels
Fancy clothes
Careers
Clicky Friends
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When we turn to any of these things as our go to priority and forget God, we cannot expect to be blessed, helped, protected, healed, lead or guided. We can no longer hear His voice. He wants to be first, NOT an afterthought when we are in trouble. God will NOT be mocked and when we put Him last, it is mocking Him. Return to God!!! Put Him first and He will bless, protect, lead, guide, direct you.
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I have turned my back on God so much that I often worry that I’m no longer worthy of His love. I know that’s the devil whispering in my ear, but it is deafening. We all need to repent and recognize the only true leader of this planet - God.
Take heart about being worthy - none of us have anything we can point to as worth. All of our deeds are but filthy rags. But God in his infinite Grace and Mercy loves us with a love that endures forever. Forever. Not until we do that one thing, or not do that other one, but forever! We need to stop listening to the devil for when we were yet sinners Jesus died for the sake of our sins. He clothed us in His righteousness. Because of Him we can come confidently before God without fear and rejoice in His presence. Rest easy fren. God loves you!!!
Thank you for sharing that! In my heart I know He loves me and forgives me. I just need to rid myself of the shame.
You are so welcome! We all go through this. God is patient and kind. He’s with you and He loves you.
We all have sinned. All of us. (Except maybe my Grandma, RIP Nana!) I think a repentant sinner is God's favorite. I hope so anyway. I've done a LOT of repenting! God bless us, one and all.
the hardest thing to forgive is ones self...but that shows you have a soul worth saving