When I was growing up I got spanked by my parents and whenever it happened I almost always did something to deserve it and I knew it. My cousins got the same, and my siblings.
My grandma is Indian from Trinidad and Tobago, she had the scarriest punishment and you knew to listen to grandma and behave:
- normally she'd give you a light knock on the crown of the head, it was like the worse ever because nothing is injured and she hardly touched you and it hurt so bad
- "The heat for the seat" was a large wooden decorative spoon the size of a plate, she broke it on my cousin when he wouldn't stop beating me up
We laugh about it now, he knew he deserved it and it was funny in hindsight that it broke after correcting 2 generations of familly members.
Growing up I could always tell the kids that were never spanked from the ones that were. The kids who were never spanked all had these traits:
- complete lack of fear of authority
- complete disrespect for adult
- bullying of others, including crybullying
- lack of respect for the law
- propensity to cheat
- no respect for other people property
- a willigness to commit petty theft for fun
I think that the modern ideals are wrong. I believe in the old wisdom of our forefathers.
Grandma was right to hit us.
if parents do THEIR jobs correctly - there should be no need for anyone else to punish the kids! My girls KNEW that if they misbehaved in school and this bear momma had to show up for ANY reason not related to education - there would be heck to pay! And now, my grandbabies KNOW that granny loves them very much but will NOT tolerate any disrespect or bad actions. My oldest and her hubby chose not to spank or deal with disrespect and the kids act out all the time. When granny is alone with them, it's like night and day on how they act. God bless all!
I agree. Ideally, corporal punishment shouldn't be necessary at all. However, not all parents are perfect. Sometimes they may see reasonable corporal punishment as the only option. While not ideal, it is better than not addressing the behaviour at all.
However, the prevailing culture these days is parents to not discipline their kids at all in any way. In fact, the philosophy is that everything that comes naturally to a child is inherently good and should be nurtured, not supressed. By that same logic, you should never potty train your child. That sounds insane, but many people think they can make an exception for potty training but otherwise give the children a free pass on everything else. However, the end result is a seriously dysfunctional adult who has no impulse control and can barely function in society. This is the kind of philosophy that results in these same parents arguing with a teacher when their child misbehaves in school, instead of addressing the child's behaviour. It leads nowhere good. I would argue, based on observation, that most children are under-discipled these days, not over-disciplined.