I don't drink often, but when I do I get ridiculously drunk, I become a monster. Im surrounded by some of the best people in the world, but I always end up doing or saying something i can hardly deal with the next day, aside from that, they are more than forgiving. I just recently had a bout of this for my birthday. I generally think this is because I bottle my feelings and the only way I know how to release them is by blacking out and throwing a temper tantrum or sobbing. Its crazy because I'm a grown man. I hate it, i actually hate it. Its like I never grew up, a child stuck in an aging body. I tell myself it wont happen again. Then after months i go out for a beer or a drink and wake up embarrassed seeing flashes of this animal mixed with absolutely nothingness. Wondering what i did or said. While not really wanting to know. If any of you are dealing with this or have, what helped? I dont mind if you Share some embarrassing moments you've dealt with or just how to deal with it. Thanks, this place is the only place I know to ask because I don't have anyone else to talk too.