Running The Gauntlet
Well, they did it.
I woke up this morning (31st March) to see on Telegram the news about the indictment from the previous day (30th March in the US). I was surprised, and experienced the usual gamut of emotions, but over a very short period of time. The first thing I felt was an attack of discouraging and worrying energy. This usually happens when I get hit by certain informational 'attacks'. An event happens that I think the enemy seeks to invest with a raw destructive emotional energy.
So I decided to keep my distance from things, and delayed my usual GAW logon, to give myself time to process the negative energy. Had things to do in the afternoon anyway.
Anyway, after a short time, I felt a poignant mixture of sorrow and gratitude. I felt a real sense of sorrow for DJT., how he keeps getting hit with this stuff, again and again and again. He has taken so many hits. But I also felt just as keen a sense of gratitude, that God loves us so much that he would raise up a champion like DJT.
Later in the day, the spirit of gloom and worry just drifted away. I returned to reality, having done a bit of a dive into the dreaded "doomies" for a few hours. The “doomies” is that aforementioned negative energy that seems to be infused into informational attacks from the enemy.
Getting hit with the news and experiencing the resulting emotional response within can be like running a gauntlet. Another metaphor that comes to mind is being thrown overboard into a deep ocean of dark emotional energy, but then slowly, surely, patiently, rising back towards the surface and the light, all the time holding my breath so that I’m not overcome by what surrounds me.
I’m so used to this process now. A few years back, it took days or even weeks to process a negative emotional attack. (I tend to see certain emotional surges like a psychological attack from a satanic enemy, who intends certain information or news to be negative or harmful.) But I know so well how to process such attacks now.
Learning To Swim The Emotional Ocean
Key to my approach is not rejecting my feelings and emotions. For many years now, I have held the conviction and acted on the basis of the idea that our human emotions have a dual purpose. One purpose is the experience itself, and the stimulation of a response. Joy, hope, care, concern, determination - emotions deliver the flavor of life to us, and stimulate certain types of responses. Anger activates the fighting impulse. Concern activates caring and investment. Etc.
However, in my view, emotions also have a fundamental purpose to teach me about myself. They are a form of informational feedback loop. All the emotions I experience provide a clue of some sort as to something about myself that I may or may not have been aware of. Even negative emotions have the role of telling me important things, but this only works if I listen.
For example, if I experience anger, it means that I care about something. If I didn’t care, I would not feel angry. But the hard part is figuring out what it is that I care about. For a very long time, I had no idea that my anger arose because I felt hurt, and in pain, and I wanted to NOT feel hurt and pain. I cared about feeling good.
Often what really triggers the emotions is hidden. As fractured humans, we all misplace or project certain emotions. When I misplace, project or reject an emotion, I end up being unable to learn what that emotions is perfectly designed to teach me about myself.
Commonly, instinctively, humans tend to deal with painful emotions by locking them up, ignoring or suppressing them. We push them away, or down or we ignore them and bury them. That’s not necessarily a bad thing. At the right time, it can be a necessary coping mechanism. For example, a child experiencing severe abuse will naturally have to burying the emotions that arise in order to simply survive the ordeal. The problem is that later, when the cause of the emotions has gone, the mechanism of suppression will often stay in place, locking us in emotionally into that experience, and the buried emotions keep clawing at us like some distant and malignant spirit from the grave.
Eventually, the emotions have to resurface so that we can experience them, learn from them, and release them. But if we continue to suppress them, ignore them, deny their existence, then we cannot move on. We become stuck, and those painful or difficult emotions become our masters, instead of our servants.
MK Ultra and the like (Satanic ritual abuse) is a horrific distortion and abuse of the emotional dimension. However, to some extent, all people born in this fallen world suffer wounds and scars as we grow up, and many, many of those wounds end up buried in our unconscious mind, where they continue to influence us while consciously we live in a state of unawareness.
The Red Pills May Be Informational, But They Ride On An Emotional Train
The emotional condition is closely related to red pilling and waking up, as well as black pilling and staying asleep. New information will trigger thoughts and raise emotions that a person may or may not be ready or equipped to deal with. If the person senses that they are unequipped, if the emotions that are triggered are too frightening (think of how the fearful idea of a monster can truly terrorize or frighten a young child), then their subconscious and conscious systems will trigger a shut down.
The way I see it, what all of this means is that to truly traverse the Great Awakening as an instrument that pioneers the way, as someone who can open the future doors for more and more people as humanity wakes up, as an anon, I need to be open to learning the language of my emotions.
The starting point for me, then, is to firstly not deny any emotions or reject them. I observe them. I work on not reacting to them. I observe. What am I feeling? What does this mean? Does this emotion (aka emotional response in me) tell me anything about myself? My mind? My past? My priorities? Etc. If I don’t understand it, I don’t push it away. I observe.
I can do this when I am not emotionally or egoically identified with my emotions. My emotions are not me. They are simply something I experience. So pleasurable ones are fun, difficult ones are not, but I try to think of them all as having some fundamental purpose to fulfill, a purpose they can only fulfill if I don’t reject them.
Think about it. What primarily prevents people from waking up and causes them to reject the truth? It happens because they are locked into rejecting and suppressing the emotions that the information triggers in them. The prospect of what they might see, think or feel if they accept certain ideas triggers painful and difficult emotions like fear, doubt, anxiety, dread, vulnerability, etc.
If this is true, then being open to whatever true emotions naturally arise within should be the practice of anyone who strives to be more fully awake.
In other words, allow your emotions to be what they are. Don't react to them, and don’t simply reject them. Understand them like waves on the ocean of your mind. Sometimes the best way to navigate or survive all sorts of waves is to simply allow yourself to rise and fall with them, or to acquiesce to them until they pass. I think anyone who has swim in big surf will get the analogy.
Rejecting a true emotional response will only push it away, thus creating an energetic tension between yourself and reality. So observe, don't react. If its a difficult emotion, let it roll over you and wait or be patient until it subsides.
Are There True Emotional Responses and False Emotional Responses?
I should note, a critical idea here is "true emotion". Because, sadly, not ALL emotional responses are true. In my current definition, a true emotional response is one that is rooted in and stems from one's original God-given nature. Our God-given nature always seeks the greatest benefit for others, for the whole, and to understand truth and not deny it.
On the other hand, we also have fallen nature inherited from the fallen angel that our ancestors united with. Fallen nature inspires selfishness, the desire for self-benefit at the cost of others. Avarice, lust, greed, spiteful anger, jealousy, etc. These are false emotional responses.
Thus, to truly be effective in the emotional sphere, one has to constantly make the effort to identify true emotional responses that are grounded in one's God-given good nature, and identify false emotional responses grounded in fallen (aka sinful) nature that is not of God. And, as one identifies, one has to deliberately encourage the former while discouraging the latter.
So it's tricky. I think that one of the hardest things on the spiritual path to learning to identify which motives, ideas, etc, are derived from God and which are derived from Evil. This, of course, is the primary purpose of the Word of God, in whatever form it comes. The Word helps us to identify what is good and what is not, and helps us to separate the two within ourselves, and to then foster the one or uphold it, while letting the other die off. (i.e. don't give it oxygen by interacting with it).
There is an important reason why God, in the Old Testament era, had the Israelites make offerings, by dividing the carcass into two. (In the case of Abraham’s critical offering (which he failed, sadly), God required him to divide the carcasses and lay the halves opposite each other. This symbolized separating the good and evil within Abraham himself, to make himself pure. When he failed to do that with the dove and the pigeon, the entire offering was claimed by Satan.)
Ultimately, the more one learns to recognize one's true self and one's true emotional responses (even if they are painful), the stronger one becomes and the less vulnerable one is to emotional manipulation. Increasingly, God becomes the natural subject of one's emotions and one ends up building a greater and greater resonance with God and Christ. Ultimately, this is like putting on the Armor of God.
A Day of Processing
I see the processing of emotional hits and attacks as being a common experience with anons. Someone posted "I heard that DJT was indicted, and I'm just like Meh!" "Or comfy". Newbies will find a lot of stuff on their emotional plate, and some may feel things more than others, but over time, many of us have simply become more and more resilient. Feelings that would have knocked us over 3 years ago almost bounce off our shoulders now. If they stick, they stick only for a short time.
Anyway, today, as when I heard that the indictment had been issued, I just let myself paddle about in the emotional waves that accompanied the idea that in fact the a**holes are indicting a true saint of modern era. I was surprised, because I really did NOT expect an indictment to be forthcoming, and I felt pretty confident in that belief. So the initial impact of the news kind of blew a hoel in my heart, as it were.
But as has now become second nature, I let the waves of negative energy flow over me. I put a pause on my engagement with things, and went about other tasks, and sure enough, over the course of the day, the negative energy just receded and then once again, the power of hope, comfiness and calm reclaimed my heart. Because, I’ve been here before. Many, many times. Many times. And once I process the emotional impact (heh. A bit like a punching bag....), the rational mind takes over and I’m feeling more and more comfy.
It does feel like things are certainly coming to a head. And, as PepeLivesMatters says, we have entered unchartered territory. So who knows what this will lead to or how it will play out? But the more intense it gets, the more I feel like dark, negative vibrational energy is seething through the information waves, the more I think that the beast is simply getting more and more desperate. Satan, in it’s heart of darkness, is slowly shrieking more and more as his minions and instruments get squeezed into oblivion.
Yes, the Cabal is truly a beast. (Personally, I think it is THE Beast.) Either way, the less and less power this beast has, the more it will rage and rage. Spiritually, that rage manifests as a dark, negative, sticky and clingy emotion of fear. So indeed, it is good to put on the armor of God, as our brother Saint Paul admonished us to.
God is good, and God loves the world. And by the way, I’m pretty sure that God loves the anons. We’re a special band of warriors. Oh, what an honor it is to stand and fight amongst the anons.
Q521
Have faith.... You were chosen for a reason....
Wise words...
Wow. ALL this post is truly excellent. Highly empowering, aware and insightful, thank you so much for writing it:
Learning To Swim The Emotional Ocean
'Key to my approach is not rejecting my feelings and emotions. For many years now, I have held the conviction and acted on the basis of the idea that our human emotions have a dual purpose. One purpose is the experience itself, and the stimulation of a response. Joy, hope, care, concern, determination - emotions deliver the flavor of life to us, and stimulate certain types of responses. Anger activates the fighting impulse. Concern activates caring and investment. Etc.
However, in my view, emotions also have a fundamental purpose to teach me about myself. They are a form of informational feedback loop. All the emotions I experience provide a clue of some sort as to something about myself that I may or may not have been aware of. Even negative emotions have the role of telling me important things, but this only works if I listen....'
You are welcome fren.
As I reviewed what I wrote, another thought came to mind. I cannot edit it in, because I already went over the post character limit (erg). But it is this:
A frequently quoted biblical phrase encapsulates an important thought:
Fear is a natural and normal response, designed to kick our adrenaline and put us into fight or flight mode for quick response to a danger. But like lactic acid in the bloodstream, if it stays too long, or is too powerful, it becomes toxic and overwhelms the system.
I mentioned "a dark, negative, sticky and clingy emotion of fear" in the post. Fear is truly the weapon the Enemy most likes. But it's so important to recognize that debilitating and constant sense of fear when there is no immediate threat of danger in my immediate vicinity primarily comes from the enemy, not me.
In this case, it doesn't come from God. Resting in God delivers a sense of security, of power, love and ... a sound (or self-disciplining) mind.
Another popular one is the Dune reference: "fear is the mind killer. It is the little death...."
So true, so true.
Thanks for the feedback!