Waking up is a process with multiple dimensions.

Remember, if you do not know what it is all for, you are powerless. And that sense of powerlessness leads to anger, frustration, disappointment, and bitterness, enforcing only your not self. ´

Divorcing yourself from a cult is a process that in length differs from person to person.

There are aids to help you. But it is you who is doing the work.

Start here. It will help you ground. The field you are navigating is not the most important. HOW you navigate it, is important.

Although there is no quick fix, no silver bullet, there are some short cuts. Human Design is one. It teaches you to look out for yourself first, and from that position of power, be of service to others, based on strategy and authority fit your your uniqueness.

This is the what for = the why.

If anything, watch the Merovingian in the Restaurant: Matrix II. Take careful note and ask yourself: What is the declaration of will of each? What is power and where? What is the view of those with power of those without?

This is the center of the Matrix: the abjuration of your own will in exchange for benefits.