This is personal, I’m sorry mods. But I don’t know where else to turn.
I’m dealing with a lot of health issues at the moment. I’ve developed an eating disorder that I can’t seem to overcome on my own. It’s getting very bad. In specific, it’s ARFID, and a fear of any food I eat causing anaphylaxis.
This was likely brought on because I’ve entered perimenopause and my hormones have gone insane. And my stress has been high since last November because of family health issues (nonvaxxed). Constantly an anxious wreck.
So now I’m at a point where I need intervention. But that’s going to be medicine and I know it. I do not trust hormone pills - when I was on birth control it made me very suicidal. And I don’t trust anxiety medicine either, because…duh lol. Also don’t trust supplements and can’t afford the more trustworthy ones. I need vitamin C.
Frankly I don’t trust doctors, either. Especially with this bullshit second round of Covid.
Im also broke. Can’t afford any kind of treatment except if I were to be sent to the ER and be billed, then I just wouldn’t be able to pay it. I lost Medicaid last month because our Covid mandates ended.
What would you do?
I pray to God constantly about this but it just keeps getting worse.
For anxiety, try Listening Prayer.
Take deep, long breaths, as many as it takes to get relaxed. Relax your body. Think of a time that you were very content, joyful, thankful, felt loved and accepted. Relive that memory, the feelings you had, what you saw, what you heard, what you felt. Relaxing your body and reliving a peaceful, loving memory helps you be relational with God. Now you can ask Him what He wants you to know, what He wants you do do next. He is the Way, He is Truth, He is Life.
There may be something blocking your connection to God, anxiety alone can do that. Try to relax and get in that relational mode with gratefulness and pray again. It's a mind-thing: your body can't be anxious and grateful at the same time.
And God hears your prayers, even tho it looks like He is not. He has not abandoned you. The Holy Spirit in you is in deep connection with Father God, even tho you can't understand that or see it happening. And your brothers and sisters here on GAW are praying for you!
You are His daughter and He has you. I don't trust doctors either, but I trust our Father who created us : ) I pray that He will bring exactly what you need at this trying time. (BTW, I'm female and know how crazy hormones can be!)
Thank you so much for all of this. As soon as I have a moment to do this tonight, I will. I pray and talk to God a lot but I often struggle with figuring out if the responses I get are His or my own subconscious.
Sorry to hear you've had to deal with these awful hormonal issues too. Rough doesn't even describe it.
Listening prayer has really helped me with my anxiety. It took a lot for me to let myself hear him, and I also thought what if it's just my thoughts, or worse, the enemy (which can be checked, is it Biblical?). There's something about God's gentle words or pictures He gives, there is peace, understanding, and connection. His words often surprise me because they aren't what I was expecting or even wanting, but they reach my spirit and demolish the lies or worries I had running laps in my head.
Those first thoughts or feelings can give a lot of info, perhaps show a block (a lie believed, a hurt not taken care of, a forgiveness that needs to be given or accepted, etc) that needs to be worked thru.