You are a great human-being! It's rough but it will be dealt with. I have her on recording saying bad things about our kids. The DA heard it and said that the same judge that they would help me in front of would be the same judge that I go before to ask for a protective order. They also said that he would look very poorly upon her for what she is doing. The judge also like Vets, so I should be solid.
It's also escalated to suicide threats. She even told me that she told the kids goodbye and "Now they are crying, good job you."
She is out of money and is trying to turn the kids on me so she can get custody/child support. It's going to back fire on her.
She seems very unstable. I imagine you could get full custody if you wanted. She's hurting her own children. She sounds awful to deal with, I've dealt with some extremely unstable women in my life. I feel for you. Reach out for anything you need, or just a fren to talk to. I'm here.
Thank you Fren. I'll update you as I go. Nice to have an Anon to talk with.
The next step is getting a petition to modify the divorce decree & protective order. I want to put her through a "Talking Parents" app that has more probative value than text messages. Plus she won't be allowed to call me. If she does then I can take her to court for breaking the decree/protective order and the judge can fine/jail her based on how bad it is. I've been recording her(legally) but she doesn't know that yet.
This way she will understand she can't be going crazy and she isn't allow to talk to me the way she has been. I talked to the kids(without giving away the suicide threat), she didn't say "goodbye" nor were they crying. She is just abusing me trying to get me to slip up so she has something to take to court. She isn't as smart as she thinks she is.
I want my kids to have their mother and father in their lives. I'm not looking to alter custody. The kids aren't hearing her talk the way she does to me. Again, she is just pushing my buttons in order to get me to slip up and make a mistake.
She hates Q if you couldn't gather that already. I think she will be a 4-6%er.
Understood. She will calm down once this is over and hopefully be a good mother to your children. I can see not wanting to take full custody. Her emotions are controlling her right now, I've seen it many times, they usually calm down after a while. Don't react to her attempts. The more you feed into their emotions the more they continue. Just be you calm and collected. I think this will work out fine. My mom used to threaten suicide to my dad as a way of manipulation. I was just a kid but it made me really worried. They would fight with me in the house. I'd fake I had a 'stomach ache' to go to her when she said she was going to kill herself. I was like 8 years old. I hope no kid has to go through what I did. Now my mom is very kind and sweet, she still tries emotional manipulation like most women do but we all see through it and ignore it. No reaction = she loses power.
I'm sorry to hear about their fights affecting you. Maybe it just made you stronger in the end.
You are absolutely correct about "No Reaction = Power Loss". It look me a long time to figure this out. It took me longer to figure out how to use it. Most of my replies are just "Okay". She even started doing it back to me. Which at first got to me(silly I know), but now I just chuckle and think "Good girl"
You are a great human-being! It's rough but it will be dealt with. I have her on recording saying bad things about our kids. The DA heard it and said that the same judge that they would help me in front of would be the same judge that I go before to ask for a protective order. They also said that he would look very poorly upon her for what she is doing. The judge also like Vets, so I should be solid.
It's also escalated to suicide threats. She even told me that she told the kids goodbye and "Now they are crying, good job you."
She is out of money and is trying to turn the kids on me so she can get custody/child support. It's going to back fire on her.
Thank you for the offer!
She seems very unstable. I imagine you could get full custody if you wanted. She's hurting her own children. She sounds awful to deal with, I've dealt with some extremely unstable women in my life. I feel for you. Reach out for anything you need, or just a fren to talk to. I'm here.
Thank you Fren. I'll update you as I go. Nice to have an Anon to talk with.
The next step is getting a petition to modify the divorce decree & protective order. I want to put her through a "Talking Parents" app that has more probative value than text messages. Plus she won't be allowed to call me. If she does then I can take her to court for breaking the decree/protective order and the judge can fine/jail her based on how bad it is. I've been recording her(legally) but she doesn't know that yet.
This way she will understand she can't be going crazy and she isn't allow to talk to me the way she has been. I talked to the kids(without giving away the suicide threat), she didn't say "goodbye" nor were they crying. She is just abusing me trying to get me to slip up so she has something to take to court. She isn't as smart as she thinks she is.
I want my kids to have their mother and father in their lives. I'm not looking to alter custody. The kids aren't hearing her talk the way she does to me. Again, she is just pushing my buttons in order to get me to slip up and make a mistake.
She hates Q if you couldn't gather that already. I think she will be a 4-6%er.
Understood. She will calm down once this is over and hopefully be a good mother to your children. I can see not wanting to take full custody. Her emotions are controlling her right now, I've seen it many times, they usually calm down after a while. Don't react to her attempts. The more you feed into their emotions the more they continue. Just be you calm and collected. I think this will work out fine. My mom used to threaten suicide to my dad as a way of manipulation. I was just a kid but it made me really worried. They would fight with me in the house. I'd fake I had a 'stomach ache' to go to her when she said she was going to kill herself. I was like 8 years old. I hope no kid has to go through what I did. Now my mom is very kind and sweet, she still tries emotional manipulation like most women do but we all see through it and ignore it. No reaction = she loses power.
I'm sorry to hear about their fights affecting you. Maybe it just made you stronger in the end.
You are absolutely correct about "No Reaction = Power Loss". It look me a long time to figure this out. It took me longer to figure out how to use it. Most of my replies are just "Okay". She even started doing it back to me. Which at first got to me(silly I know), but now I just chuckle and think "Good girl"